Remember Me
by EnsignZero
Summary: An injury in battle causes Fate to lose much of her memories. But as she cobbles them back together, does she really want to get back the life she lost? Some NanoFate, Some FateXHayate. Rating may change as the story progresses.
1. Chapter 1

A/N and Disclaimers:

I do not own any of the characters or related stuff from the series. This is my first MGLN fic, so be nice. And feel free to leave a review to let me know how I'm doing.

Just for the sake of setting the scene, this happens 3 years after Force, so Fate, Nanoha and Hayate are 28. Vivio is now 15.

* * *

01:

This wasn't going according to plan.

None of this was going according to plan.

This was meant to be a simple mission. Go in, secure the premises. Wait for further instruction. None of them could have known that the place was swarming with hostiles. None of them could have predicted that even with the full deployment of the hastily re-established Riot Force 6, the TSAB forces were pinned down behind some scraps of twisted metal. None of them could have anticipated the protracted 8 hour long standoff that was now stretching into its ninth hour. And none of them was prepared for it. In this battle of endurance, it seemed that the enemy had gone for sheer numbers to overwhelm the intruding forces. More cyborgs poured into the hallway, armed to the teeth and apparently ridiculously trigger happy, firing off shots in every imaginable direction.

_"StarS team, do you copy? What's your status?"_

Hayate's voice crackled to life over the communication channel as one of the shots ricocheted particularly close to where Nanoha crouched.

"Hayate? Yes. But we're pinned down here." Nanoha reported, casting worried glances over at her two forwards hunkered down a fair distance from her. Her two team members shot her a look of determination, making quick weapons checks while waiting out the enemies' suppressing fire. The air was punctuated by the sound of mages from other teams being taken down, their numbers dwindling rapidly. The situation was quickly becoming dire. They needed more backup.

"We will need more firepower here. And more cartridges."

_"Sorry Nanoha, but we're stretched to our limits at this point. We've sent for backup from the main fleet but it'll take them 15 minutes."_

_"Lightning team is en route."_

The auburn haired girl felt her breath catch slightly at Fate's even tone coming through the communication channel. It had been too long since she had heard the blonde's soft but commanding voice, but this was not the place she wanted them to be reunited.

"No, don't come here. The area is way too unstable."

_"Nanoha's right, Fate. Do not enter zone H-7 now. We have to wait for a lull in their attack before attempting to punch through their offence."_

Nanoha grimaced as another shot rang dangerously close to her. She cast a sidewards look at Subaru who signalled her use of her final cartridge. They were running out of time. They had to find a way to retaliate before-

There was a deafening boom as a massive shell smashed into the upturned bit of metal flooring Nanoha was kneeling behind, sending the white mage flying several feet across the ground. Several cyborgs took the opportunity to begin concentrating their fire on the exposed Nanoha as the already battered Raising Heart quickly put up a shield.

The flight instructor's eyes widened as she saw the large cracks arc across her barrier. The blows were coming to strong, too fast, and the thin barrier she had hastily put up was very quickly beginning to fail under the pressure. She could hear Hayate yelling something over the communication channel. She could see Subaru and Teana running towards her.

There simply wasn't enough time to put up another barrier. Her voice left her lips in a near inaudible whisper. "Fate…"

There was a final loud resounding crack and Nanoha braced herself for the impact.

"NANOHA!"

_"Sonic Drive."_

An impossibly brilliant golden glow exploded in front of the auburn haired girl accompanied by the sickening smell of burning flesh. Cobalt eyes shot open to see the last person she had expected standing above her, shielding her, just like she had so many years ago. When she battled Vita for the first time. She had called out her name, and she had come to her. But this time was different.

Nanoha's eyes widened as she saw the blonde thrown forcibly backwards from a direct headshot, the poor defence she had traded for massively increased speed shattering completely, allowing an arc of bright red to strike her, sending the enforcer crumpling to the ground.

An anguished scream she could hardly recognise as her own filled the air as pink light flooded her vision.

* * *

"Harlaown-san?"

Nanoha looked up at the short haired doctor now hovering above her. The TSAB medical facility corridor was no stranger to her, but this time, it felt completely foreign, isolating, stifling, and a familiar face was sorely needed. It had been a while since she had seen Dr Ishida Sachie. Hayate had called for her personally to take on Fate's case, insisting that the enforcer have nothing but the best neurologist available.

Nanoha gave the other woman a weak smile. "It's Takamachi now. For the last couple of years."

"Oh… Takamachi-san," Dr Ishida smiled sadly. "It has been a while. I wish we had met again under different circumstances."

"Me too." replied Nanoha, halfheartedly returning the smile. "Is Fate alright?"

"She's lucky to be alive." answered the doctor honestly. "I'm not familiar with magical injuries, but taking a direct hit to the head like that would have surely killed her. By some miracle, it didn't."

"When will she wake up?" The ponytailed mage was not sure if she wanted to hear the answer to that.

"That's difficult to say, Takamachi-san. Her body needs time to heal, but we won't know the true extent of her head injury until she wakes up."

"I see…"

"You can go in and see her now if you'd like."

Nanoha had been putting off going into the room for the last 2 hours, mostly worried about how she would react to seeing the blonde again. Or how Fate would react, for that matter. After all that happened. After all that was said, and not said. But the sight that greeted her was nothing like what she had expected. It was unnerving. Seeing Fate hooked up to dozens of monitors, bags of blood being fed into her system through massive cannulas in both arms. Most of her head was swathed in bandages lightly soaked with blood from the surgery. She looked deathly pale, all of her usual radiance muted. Nanoha almost didn't recognise the blonde, the chart with her name on it the only identifier. Her breaths came to her in measured puffs from the ventilator which buzzed noisily in the corner of the room, breaking through the otherwise sterile silence.

She nearly didn't feel the tears beginning to prick the corners of her eyes. It should have been her lying there. After everything she put Fate through, this last sacrifice seemed completely unfair. She reached out to grasp the blonde's hand, but stopped herself, letting her hand fall limply to her side. It was simply too much. She resigned to simply sitting by the bedside, refusing to take her eyes away from Fate, yet refusing to touch her, almost afraid she would wake.

"Sensei…" Nanoha began in a shaky voice she barely recognised as her own. "I know this is a lot to ask, and I know the hospital's policy on only family being allowed here…"

Dr Ishida paused in the doorway, turning to give Nanoha a small smile. "Takamachi-san, as far as I'm concerned, the only people I see in this room right now are her family."

* * *

_3 years ago... _

"The progress you've made is simply astounding, Hayate-chan. If I didn't know any better, I would be questioning these old medical records."

Hayate grinned at her neurologist, setting her tea cup down on the coffee table. "It's all thanks to Dr Ishida, really. If you had given up on me like all the other doctors, I simply would not be standing here today. Literally."

Dr Ishida smiled fondly at her patient. Today would be the last official visit before she officially discharged Hayate from her care. Needless to day, she had become very fond of her young patient who had undoubtedly grown into a poised and vibrant young woman. She often related Hayate's determination during rehabilitation to her other patients as a form of inspiration, though she was almost sure that nothing short of magic would have caused such a drastic turnaround of her condition.

A chime went off somewhere in the house and Hayate rose to get the door, leaving Dr Ishida in the living room. Bright golden eyes took the small opportunity to survey her surroundings. The house had not changed much since Hayate was a child. Pictures of her… Relatives… adorned the walls, along with snapshots of her friends. Though they all seemed to be frozen in time, over 19 years ago. Almost as if Hayate had not lived here in years…

"Dr Ishida," smiled Hayate as she returned, ushering her two guests into the apartment. Familiar faces from the photographs on the walls. "Allow me to introduce my good friends, Fate and Nanoha Harlaown."

"Yes, I do remember these two." the doctor said, rising from her seat to warmly shake the two by the hand. "You visited Hayate when she was in the hospital."

"Sensei has a very good memory." Nanoha beamed.

"Though I do remember one of you being a Takamachi back then."

The white mage flushed beet red, increasing her grip on Fate's hand. Her wife only gave a light chuckle and a reassuring squeeze back. Despite being married for the last 6 months, the flight instructor was still terribly shy about disclosing their highly publicised mid-childian wedding to people back on her home planet. Something about how people on earth simply would not understand.

"No need to be so embarrassed Harlaown-san." assured the doctor, laughing quietly. "I think it is a gift - finding someone you love who can love you back so wholeheartedly. Congratulations to you both."

Fate gave the doctor a quiet smile and an appreciative nod. "Dr Ishida, would you be requiring a ride to town?"

"It's quite alright, Harlaown-san." the purple haired woman said, hoisting her briefcase up from the floor. "You ladies enjoy your afternoon. Hayate, I will be seeing you around. Don't get into any trouble, you hear?"

Hayate shot her a cheeky grin. "Can't promise you that, sensei!"

The doctor cast a final backwards glance at the 3 young women in the doorway, letting out a forlorn sigh about her youth long gone and young love. Her eyes paused briefly at the young couple, Fate's arm placed reassuringly around Nanoha's waist.

_"If only love could be so simple…"_

* * *

It was a month now. A month of sitting by the bedside of the unconscious blonde. Nanoha slipped into the room silently, as she always did, as if afraid to wake the blonde. She set the new bouquet of lilies in the vase the nurses had set out for her. It was almost routine now. She would come in after work, sit by Fate's bedside for hours, sometimes talking about her day. Sometimes reading her a book. The blonde never answered. And Nanoha was glad for the most part. She wouldn't know what to say if the blonde did wake up to see her there. If Fate hated her for everything. Or worse, forgave her for everything. Yet there she found herself everyday at 5.30pm, standing in front of Fate's room at the hospital.

One by one, the life support machines were weaned off and taken away. Until all that was left was a simple bag of fluids that was meant to have all the nutrients her body needed to stay alive. But still Fate slumbered.

Nanoha settled herself down on the less-than-comfortable plastic seat next to the bed as she always did, venturing a lingering gaze on the blonde. It was so much easier looking at her like this. So peaceful. So different from the last time she had seen the enforcer, the agony and heartbreak clouding those crimson eyes she used to love so much.

Still loved.

"I wonder what you're dreaming about, Fate-chan…" Nanoha sighed quietly, staring at the lidded eyes. This was how most of her evenings went, really. Wondering when the enforcer would open her eyes and-

Movement.

Burgundy eyes fluttered open slowly, squinting weakly from the bright light that flooded her eyes. It was almost as if she had not used her eyes in years. Her voice caught in her parched throat as she let out an uncomfortable groan, attempting to blink some colour into her blurred vision. Finally, the haze began to lift and crimson eyes slowly registered information, taking in her surroundings.

"Fate…" an unfamiliar voice choked out. Fate turned to look at the girl who was staring at her with an unreadable expression in her eyes. This girl was close. Too close. She began to register a hand grasping hers tightly.

"Who… Are you?"


	2. Chapter 2

A/N:

Thank you everyone for your kind reviews. I do have a plan for this story, and while it may not suit everyone's expectations, I hope you can still enjoy reading the story as much as I enjoy writing it.

In response to one of the guest comments, I made a quick search of the fanfiction database to look for the fic in question (regarding Fate and Hayate in a cave somewhere or something or rather), but have yet to find it. Unfortunately, I am not familiar with that work, but if I unwittingly infringe on anyone's idea, please feel free to let me know so I may take the appropriate steps to remedy the situation. With the "memory loss" theme being a rather popular vein in the world of fan fiction, it is unavoidable that some of the topics addressed in this work may resemble previous works. But I will endeavour to make this as interesting and novel a read as I possibly can.

With that in mind, let's move on to chapter 2. Once again, your kind support is always appreciated.

* * *

02:

The next few hours were occupied by an assortment of strangers coming through the door. Most of them crying uncontrollably. Some yelling at her for getting injured. Some bearing gifts they assured her she liked. But she really couldn't tell.

Fate smiled awkwardly, not entirely sure how else to react. It was like her life was a blank slate with simply her name scrawled across the top. If that was her name, anyway. She couldn't be sure if her name was all she could remember, or if it had been drummed into her mind with everyone calling her that. This seemingly endless tide of people barging into her room seemed to be looking for someone she was not. She gave her visitors what she hoped were friendly smiles, comforting some of those who were crying, especially the one named Yagami Hayate, who had a pretty dramatic flair for wailing. It felt odd comforting her visitors. Wasn't she the one who should be feeling sad? Yet it was difficult to feel sad when she didn't feel any loss.

There was a soft knock on the door and a slightly worn looking woman with slightly disheveled short purple hair entered the room. This one she knew. If only from their interactions earlier today. The doctor gave everyone an apologetic smile, assuring them she would only take a couple of minutes as she ushered them out of the room. Fate took a deep breath. Felt like she could breathe again.

"Harlaown-san." Dr Ishida began, setting her file down at the end of the bed while she moved to Fate's bedside. The blonde was silently thankful for the medical officer's intrusion. Being surrounded by sniffling strangers was beginning to become slightly suffocating. "How are you feeling?"

"Like crap." Fate answered. It was the most honest she had been all day.

"That's understandable. You were asleep for quite some time." Dr Ishida said, peering at the myriad of beeping machines. "Where is Takamachi-san?"

She must have been referring to that brown haired girl.

"She left just before everyone else came." replied Fate, making a mental name tag for the unknown girl and filing it away under 'friends of Fate'.

"I see… I would have thought she would have stayed longer."

"Why is that?"

Dr Ishida thought for a moment, unsure of how much information about Fate's past to divulge to her. "She's been here every day since you came in, Harlaown-san."

Fate contemplated her words as the doctor entered some notes on the holographic chart in front of her.

"Did I really know these people, sensei?" the blonde asked quietly, halting Dr Ishida.

"Harlaown-san," the older woman said, closing the holo-terminal with a quick wave of her hand to sit at the edge of the bed. "I have never seen a group of individuals more dedicated to someone. You are someone very important to them. Whether or not you remember them, they all love you, and I am certain you can feel that."

"I can, and that's what bothers me." Fate responded, the emptiness in her voice more evident. "I'm just somebody who looks like someone they knew."

* * *

"Here are your personal effects, Commander Harlaown."

Fate frowned at the receptionist giving her that strange forlorn look to accompany her inappropriately sweet tone, then at collection of items she did not recognise. It had been a week since she had woken up, and everyday seemed like a bombardment on her already fragmented mind. Every day someone new to remember. Every day questions from TSAB agents she could not possibly answer.

She was infinitely grateful to the one they called Shamal who, quite literally, worked her magic and got her atrophied muscles working again so she could be discharged much sooner than expected. She was constantly being visited by people she was beginning to get to know, most often by Hayate who managed to concoct a new excuse to visit every day.

But that pony tailed girl never came again.

What did Dr Ishida call her again?

Takamachi-san.

Right.

Damn these names were complex.

Burgundy eyes attempted to register the things displayed to her on the desk. Were these all really her belongings? There sure weren't a lot of them. A battered cellphone. 3 mostly destroyed access cards. A small silver key. She sifted through the items gingerly, eyes eventually falling on a simple band of white gold.

"Are you sure these are mine?" asked Fate again.

"Yes ma'am. Everything we found on you at the time."

The blonde enforcer frowned again, furrowing her brow as she scooped up the unfamiliar items into the bag she had. She picked up the ring last, tentatively trying it on each finger until it slid comfortably onto her left ring finger. However, regardless of how well the ring fit, it filled her with a sense of unimaginable sadness.

She promptly removed the ring and plopped it into the bag with the other belongings. She had enough sadness to deal with already.

* * *

"Home sweet home!" declared Hayate, wheeling Fate into the small studio apartment. The lift and door were a tad too small to accommodate the wheelchair, but through sheer willpower and determination, they were here, and Fate now had a marginally larger doorway.

"This… Is my room?" Fate questioned, looking about the small space. She had wondered what sort of person she used to be. But the walls were barren, the room devoid of the personal items that she was hoping might clue her in to a past forgotten. No photographs. No knick knacks or even civilian clothing. Even the fridge was barely stocked with anything other than some cans of drink. It was almost as if she never really did live here.

"Well, yeah." Hayate said, sensing a bit of the blonde's trepidation. "It's not much, but you hardly spend time here anyway. You're always off on some mission or another."

The blonde cast her faze around the small apartment. There wasn't much to orientate herself to, really. A small kitchen, and even smaller bathroom. A small glass table with a single dining chair. And an impeccably made sofa bed which Fate now moved to get herself seated on the edge of when Hayate sprung into action, grasping her hand and insisting on helping her up.

"Let me help you with that-"

Fate snatched her hand away roughly, turning to snap harshly at the brunette. "I'm an amnesiac, not a fucking cripple!"

Hayate was visibly taken aback by the blonde's sudden outburst, pausing for a moment before slowly letting go of the slim wrist in her hand.

Fate averted her gaze. The pain in the other girl's eyes was simply too difficult for her to keep looking at. "I'm… I'm sorry Yagami-san."

"Hayate." the brunette corrected, a hint of sadness in the smile she gave the blonde.

"Hayate." Fate sighed. "This is all just quite exhausting for me."

"Hahaha… That's alright, Fate. It's a lot to take in." Hayate's voice sounded slightly strained, her laugh sounding more hollow than she probably intended it to. "If you ever need anything, just call me."

The blonde furrowed her eyebrows slightly at the brunette. Calling her name with such familiarity, Yagami Hayate must have known her pretty well. She watched silently as Hayate fussed over a few other minor things about the house before hesitating in front of Fate. She seemed to be tossing things up in her head before relenting to whatever internal struggle she was battling and giving her an awkward hug, promising to call again the next day.

The click of the door shutting spurred the enforcer into action. Fate overturned the small paper bag onto the tiny dining table, poking at the items tentatively. She couldn't help but feel like she had stolen these things off some stranger. Sighing, she picked up the worn looking cellphone and flipped it open. Surprisingly, the battery was still eking out just enough power for her to browse through its contents briefly. Hardly any text messages, and if there were any, they were nearly all about work. Her contact list itself was pretty sparse, holding only the office, Lindy Harlaown and Hayate's numbers.

The blonde let out another sigh. The cellphone was not very helpful after all. But it did ascertain that Hayate was indeed a friend. The phone made a particularly flat sounding chime, indicating its very imminent death before flickering off, leaving Fate staring at the recently demised device.

After several minutes of crushing silence, Fate decided she would go for a walk.

* * *

She was lost.

Undeniably. Definitely. Lost.

She couldn't even remember the roads she took to get to this park, but in all honesty, she didn't really care. She would wander the streets as far away from that apartment and all its unanswered questions as possible if she could. Away from the life of the Fate T. Harlaown she most definitely was not. It was infuriating how she could feel so very isolated when being surrounded by people who knew her.

And there lay the crux of the matter.

They knew her.

But to her, they were just strangers.

She silently cursed her past self for not leaving more of an identity for her to cobble her past back together. But then again, who would anticipate and prepare for a situation like this?

Her feet somehow brought her to a lake somewhere in this nameless park, pausing to watch as the amber rays of the sunset scattered across the surface of the water. The park was beginning to empty. But time had little consequence to her when she had no concept of past or future.

She turned to leave when a flash of auburn caught her eye. The ponytailed girl sat on a park bench not too far away, her hands placed neatly on her lap. The wind rippled through the long tresses and tugged playfully at the lapels of her blue and white uniform, but none of that seemed to distract her from the very intense blank stare she had.

Fate felt a quiet anger gnaw away at her. If she had so much time to just sit by some lake, why hadn't she come to visit? She quashed the bubbling feelings, unsure why she felt so frustrated at someone she had only met a few days ago, and only for a few minutes before she left stuttering to get the doctors.

What was her name again?

Right.

"Takamachi-san…"

Nanoha jumped, snapping out of her reverie, only to nearly leap out of her seat when she saw who was talking to her. The blonde was definitely not one of the people she was expecting to see here. She hastily got to her feet, brushing the few stray strands of hair behind her ear in an attempt to hide the faint blush she was now sporting.

"Fate-chan, what are you doing out of the hospital?"

"I got discharged today." Fate shrugged.

There was a pang of guilt that flickered through Nanoha's eyes. She had been doing her best to avoid the blonde once she had regained consciousness. An attempt to gather her thoughts to figure out what she wanted to say to her. A "thank you for saving me"? A "I really missed you"? An "I'm really sorry for everything I put you through"? Did any of that really matter now that Fate could not even remember her name? Nanoha decided to defer that confusing conversation once again. Till she was ready. Whenever that was. "Do you live close to here?"

"I really wouldn't know. I'm quite lost." confessed Fate.

"Oh.. Sorry."

This tension was suffocating.

"Hey… Wouldn't be the first time I forgot something today." laughed Fate awkwardly, if only to break the silence between them.

Nanoha smiled apologetically, grateful for the out offered. Fate hated that smile. The one full of pity. There were so many of those looks this past week. But she still plastered that same smile on her face. If only to make the girl in front of her feel better. The flight instructor took the opportunity to look at Fate. Properly this time. The bandages had long come off, her long blonde hair easily hiding the scar at her temple. The blonde had surely made a surprisingly quick recovery, the trauma of a month-long coma barely showing. Cobalt eyes followed the long silky strands up towards the other girl's face, finally locking onto those questioning pools of burgundy. Those eyes she had not gazed into for years. Those eyes which had not looked her way since they last parted ways. Those eyes which used to speak volumes without her ever having to utter a word.

She almost lost herself in those eyes again.

But these eyes were different now. And this wasn't the Fate-chan she knew.

Nanoha was the first to break their intense stare, turning her attention to the watch on her wrist.

"Nyahaha look at the time. I'd better head back soon."

"That's true…" Fate noted the rapidly darkening park as the lights along the pavement began to spring to life. "Takamachi-san, this is going to sound truly infantile, but… Do you know where I live?"

Nanoha blinked. "No, Fate-chan, you never told me where you lived."

"Oh…" Fate's voice sounded disappointed. For all the foreign emotion she felt when looking at the auburn haired girl, they weren't even close enough for her to know her address.

"I'll call Hayate-chan for you."

"Thank you, Takamachi-san." responded the blonde genuinely.

Nanoha visibly flinched at Fate's words. What she would give to just hear that voice call her name once again. In that warm, loving tone she had grown addicted to.

But that hour had long past.

And the now all that was left was polite reservation and words she could never find the courage to say.

* * *

_3 years ago…. _

There was a sharp sound of a key scraping into the lock, drawing Nanoha's attention away from the dishes and to the front door. There was only one person she was expecting tonight…

The door clicked open and almost immediately, the blonde enforcer in the doorway was assaulted by a whirlwind of auburn hair and flailing limbs. Her initial shock gave way to a soft smile as she dropped her bag, encircling the white mage in a tight embrace. She inhaled deeply, breathing in the intoxicating mix of roses and something that was just distinctly Nanoha.

"I'm home, Nanoha." she said softly into the other girl's shoulder.

Nanoha grinned, letting herself bask in the warmth and scent she had missed so much for the last 2 months. "Welcome back."

"Fate mama!"

Fate smiled as a her daughter scampered towards her, raising an arm to hug the youngster close to her side. "Hello Vivio-chan. Were you a good girl while I was gone?"

"Mama, I'm already 12!" Vivio huffed grumpily, attempting to shake the blonde's hand from ruffling her hair.

Fate chuckled. "And I'm still your mama, right?"

The young girl eventually relented, allowing her mother to muss up her hair for a few more moments before squirming out from her grasp.

"Presents?" grinned the 12 year old.

"Of course." smiled Fate. "I wouldn't dare return without them."

After the usual handing out of presents and souvenirs from her tour of duty, Vivio was marched off to bed, oddly without much fuss, leaving her two mothers to themselves. She had learned many years ago not to intrude on her mamas "private time", lest be faced with the blunt end of a frustrated Nanoha.

Nanoha stretched lightly as she walked into their bedroom, quite happy that this evening, she wouldn't have to fall asleep alone in this massive bed. She knew it was Fate's job, but she would be lying if she said she didn't feel a slight resentment towards TSAB whenever a mission took the blonde away from their home for months on end. It seemed like they were apart more than they were together, and Nanoha made it a point to ensure whenever her girlfriend was home, she enjoyed time with her family to the fullest. She turned to see Fate standing by the window, holding Bardiche in the palm of her hand.

"Nanoha," Fate began as Bardiche silently activated, cloaking her in her barrier jacket. "Fly with me."

"Fate-chan?" the white mage looked quizzically at the blonde. "Where are we going?"

"Trust me." came the simple reply.

Nanoha nodded, her wordless command to Raising Heart activating her own barrier jacket as she took Fate's hand and stepped off the window ledge, shooting off into the night sky. They drew long arcs in the canvas of darkness, cruising outwards and away from the city. They seemed to fly for ages and Nanoha was about to ask where they were headed to when Fate turned to her with a soft smile.

"We're here."

They slowed their approach. They were now quite a fair way from Cranagan, the lights of the city receding into a dim glow in the distance, silhouetting the skyscrapers as a toothy line on the horizon. But from here, away from the light pollution, where the darkness enveloped everything, the sky was painted with the entire cosmos. The two moons of mid childa cast their soft blue glow across the untouched landscape, highlighting the dramatic mountain ranges and valleys that streaked across the land, taking Nanoha's breath away.

"It's beautiful…"

Fate smiled, the light from the moons tracing the outline of her sharp jaw. "When I am on a faraway mission, I would look up to the night sky and wonder on which of those brilliant lights is my family on, and when I can see them again."

"You know we're always here waiting for you, Fate-chan." smiled Nanoha, leaning into her girlfriend's warmth, intertwining her fingers with the blonde's. She felt Fate's warmth through the back of her barrier jacket, letting herself get enveloped in the smell of lilies.

"But I don't want you to wait." the blonde said firmly in her low voice, sending shivers down Nanoha's spine. Her grip on the white mage's hand increased. "I don't want to have to look at my family from some faraway planet. I want to always be by your side. To make sure you never have to wait for me again. To make sure I am always there when you need me. To make sure you never have to wake up to an empty bed again."

"Fate-chan… What are you…"

Cobalt eyes widened as she felt a small metallic object being slid onto her finger. Fate slowly moved her hand away to reveal a single diamond nested on a band of white gold now sitting snugly on the auburn haired girl's ring finger. Fate leaned close to her girlfriend's ear, whispering words that only she would hear.

"Takamachi Nanoha, will you marry me?"


	3. Chapter 3

A/N:

Sorry for the long wait. Hoping this über long chapter will make up for my tardiness.

20/01/2014: Some revisions made to the end of the chapter. The feel is still the same, but hopefully I have resolved a tiny bit of Nanoha's parents' OOC-ness. I felt pretty uncomfortable reading it myself.

Also changed the first reference to Nanoha in the first paragraph to be in line with what Fate calls her. Hope this is better!

* * *

03:

It only took Hayate a few minutes to reach Fate in her sleek white coupe. For once, the blonde was thankful for the music in the car, letting the sultry sounds of quiet jazz calm her nerves. Meeting with the auburn haired girl had taken a lot more out of her than she had expected, and leaving the park and the other girl left her feeling more empty than she did going into it just half an hour before. She had hoped the flight instructor would give her more answers about what her life was like before, but all she was left with now was more questions. More insecurities.

"Hayate…" began Fate hesitantly. "Can I stay with you tonight?"

The brunette looked at her startled for a moment before her expression relaxed. "Sure you can, Fate."

"It's just, I don't really want to be alone right now." Fate hated how she sounded so vulnerable. But with all that was going on, she reckoned she was allowed to be a little vulnerable right now.

"It's okay, Fate. I'm not going anywhere." Hayate's soft declaration seemed to calm the blonde down, and the two sat in a comfortable silence as the brunette turned the car around and towards her own home. The tall apartment blocks gave way to lower, wider spread bungalows, eventually turning into a small street not too far from Fate's apartment. The brunette pulled into the driveway of a particularly large gated house before parking smoothly in the garage. Hayate led the way into her home, weaving effortlessly through the myriad of wooden corridors towards a rather large room somewhere in the back of the house.

She finally flipped on the lights, illuminating the master bedroom. For all the opulence of the mansion's exterior, the interior of this room seemed rather minimalistic. A neatly made low rise bed dominated the centre of the tatami room, a small vase of violets sitting on the simple bedside table, lightly scenting the air.

"Fate, did you want something to eat?" Hayate asked, her voice drifting out from the walk in wardrobe at the other end of the bedroom.

Fate shook her head as the brunette returned to the room, arms laden with an assortment of items. "I think I'm just going to head to bed. It's been a long day."

The other girl smiled. The first proper smile Fate had seen. Not one filled with pity, but one filled with warmth and familiarity. Before the blonde could further analyse it, a small collection of clothes was thrust into her arms. "Here are some pyjamas for you."

"Thank you."

"I'll leave you to change. Bathroom is just beyond the walk-in. You'll find everything you need in there. But I'll be right outside the door if you need anything else."

The blonde nodded in thanks and made her way to the bathroom, waiting till the bedroom door had shut before slipping out of her clothes and into the soft navy blue cotton pyjamas Hayate had given her. Fate pondered briefly on how the pyjamas seemed to fit her perfectly, even if the brunette was smaller than her. As if on instinct, she picked up the bright yellow toothbrush that was set by the sink, feeling the odd familiarity that came with it.

It unnerved her.

"I'm done."

Hayate looked up at the blonde now standing in the doorway next to her. The brunette gave her a smile, pushing herself off from her position leaning against the wall to return into the room, her dark blue jacket of her uniform now unbuttoned and the tie slightly loosened.

"You can sleep in here tonight, Fate." she said, shrugging off the jacket and placing it on the hanger by the door. She gathered a few articles of clothing from the cupboard, as well as the white toothbrush from the bathroom (much to the relief of Fate who was terrified of the idea of taking Hayate's toothbrush).

"How about you?"

Hayate waved her hand reassuringly. "I'll just take Vita's room or something. She's away on a night training exercise. Don't worry about it."

"Oh… Okay…" Fate's voice trailed off uncertainly. "Goodnight then."

The brunette paused at the door, her eyes trained on the blonde who stood nervously at the foot of the bed, fiddling awkwardly with the hem of her shirt as she stared at the bed as if completely unsure about how the entire sleeping thing worked. Not hearing the door shut, the taller girl turned to meet the gentle yet intense blue gaze. Once again, Fate saw that look of deliberation in those eyes. It lasted only for a second before it was replaced once again by that warm look that made that nervousness fade very slightly. Sighing with a soft smile, Hayate turned around, purposefully walking back towards the blonde and taking her by the hand, leading her to the bed before crawling into it and under the thick comforter.

"Hayate, what are you-"

The lights dimmed in the room and Fate felt a hand give hers a small squeeze under the covers.

"I said I'll be right here with you right?" Fate could almost make out Hayate's calming smile in the dark as her eyes began to adjust. "So don't worry. Just go to sleep."

The blonde settled uneasily into bed, her hand unwittingly brushing the smooth fabric of the other girl's uniform skirt, sending a bright red blush to her cheeks. She jerked backwards, an apology at the tip of her tongue, only to find that Hayate had already fallen asleep. Her burgundy eyes trailed across the still form of her friend before catching herself and sliding back down next to Hayate. With the rhythmic sound of Hayate's breathing, it didn't take too long before she felt her eyes slide shut as she fell into a comfortable slumber, the buzz of questions in her head finally silenced as exhaustion claimed her.

Sleep sounded like a good idea.

* * *

The next morning found Fate lying alone in the large bed, a small note by the bedside informing her that there was breakfast in the kitchen and that Hayate would be back by lunch. The blonde stretched out languidly, feeling the silken sheets course under her fingers as her eyes fell on the time projected on the ceiling. 8am. Plenty of time.

The fresh set of clothes was laid out carefully in the bathroom seemed to fit Fate easily, though that was beginning to surprise her less and less each time. Still, she was infinitely thankful that Hayate had not chosen one of those outlandish outfits that dominated an entire section of her walk-in wardrobe. She shuddered noiselessly at the thought of being forced into that french maid costume. Tugging on the light woollen sweater, the blonde somehow made her way through the house to the kitchen to find a full Japanese breakfast on the counter, and a familiar silver key sitting next to the heated tray.

Fate blanched slightly at the immense amount of food on the tray, but was instantly hooked with the first bite. Every dish on the tray was prepared to perfection, and seasoned with just the right amount of whatever ungodly cooking magic that had been used in its creation. She made a mental note to send her compliments to the chef and as soon as Fate had set the last cleaned plate in a neat stack on the counter, she turned her attention to exploring this new environment.

The house was immense. With the massive population in Cranagan, real estate was gold, and having such a large house so close to the centre of the capital seemed to be nothing less than decadent. One of the perks of being a general of the TSAB forces. Hayate had the house modelled in traditional Japanese fashion, right down to the sliding bamboo doors and bamboo shishi odoshi in the rear garden that sent a meditative knock resounding through the house ever so often. Anything to bring her a little slice of her hometown, even if she was light years away.

Fate circled the building, eventually finding herself at the front door. She fished the key out of her pocket, trying it in the main door to find that it indeed fit. Quietly, she locked the door and set off once again down the driveway and into the street, letting her feet carry her.

A good hour later, she found herself standing at the front of a tiny convenience store dwarfed by the towering skyscrapers around it. The blonde jogged into the store, purchasing a bottle of water with the money Hayate had left for her, before leaving to sit on the bench outside the store.

Or that was the plan anyway.

Until she found someone already sitting in her intended spot.

"Takamachi-san?"

The ponytailed girl turned sharply to stare incredulously at Fate, nearly dropping her bag of chips. The blonde could only stare as the white mage stuttered some form of flustered greeting.

"Fate-chan. What are you doing here?"

"I got lost. Again." Fate sighed. "Why are you here?"

"This is close to the TSAB training grounds." Nanoha explained. "I come here during my breaks. Clears my head."

Well, that was mostly true. The white mage had taken to spending more time outside of the TSAB base, slipping out whenever she could. Sitting in the officer's lounge alone brought too much heartbreak. Every time the door opened, cobalt eyes would light up, only to fall again in disappointment when it was not a certain blonde enforcer walking in. Her occasional trips to the small stores around the training grounds gave her the reprieve from baseless waiting she needed.

Until now.

Nanoha felt her heart accelerate as the blonde sat herself down next to her on the bench. She ventured a peek at Fate, only to see the other girl slouching wearily in the seat, a look of utter satisfaction on her face as she gulped down the cool drink. It was almost surreal seeing the usually elegant blonde in such a state of dishevelment. The white made ached to reach out and touch her, but stopped herself, withdrawing her hand to the security of her lap.

The enforcer was the first to speak. The flight instructor was not sure if that was a good or bad thing.

"Were we… Friends?" Fate felt ridiculous asking the question, but she felt like she had to. And tried to convey her earnestness through some pretty intense staring.

Yeah. It was a bad thing.

"Nyahaha.." Nanoha laughed awkwardly, scratching the back of her head. She couldn't recall ever feeling so awkward with someone in a long time. "I suppose you could say that."

The blonde quirked an eyebrow at the other girl's reaction. "Good friends?"

"Why do you ask?" Nanoha responded with a question. After that chance meeting in the park yesterday, she had gone home, completely drained, completely incapable of formulating "the conversation" she had promised to have with Fate one day.

"Dr Ishida said you visited me at the hospital every day while I was unconscious."

She struggled to find an answer. Damn that doctor and her good intentions. "We were… best friends."

"Were?"

"Yeah…" Nanoha struggled to find the appropriate words and failed miserably. "Lots of things happened."

Something in the other girl's voice made Fate decide not to pursue the matter, much to Nanoha's relief and Fate's mild frustration. The same something convinced the blonde to remember investigate this issue at a later date. But for today, it looked like the auburn haired girl was not going to be very helpful. She quietly observed the ponytailed girl, noticing the near imperceptible tremble in those shoulders, the almost unnoticed tightening grip of those petit hands on her lap.

An urge to reach out and comfort her swelled within Fate, and she had to catch herself before she did something _really_ stupid.

Something in her told her to leave.

"I… have to get going back to Hayate's place."

"It's not too far away." Nanoha said, calling up a holographic map before her and showing it to Fate. "Just take a left here and you'll be one the main street headed to the house."

The blonde took one last look at the map. It seemed straightforward enough. "It seemed a whole lot more complicated getting here…"

Nanoha chuckled brightly, sending an explicable flutter through Fate's chest.

"You could call me if you get lost." the flight instructor offered.

"Thank you Takamachi-san, but I don't have your number, it seems."

Nanoha's face took on a pained expression. For Fate to have removed her number from her contact list…

"Oh… Well, that's alright." her smile felt strained. But she had to smile. "It's 080-7742…"

"0955." Fate finished, seemingly surprised by herself. Wide burgundy eyes stared at Nanoha with a mix of confusion and nervousness.

"How did you…?"

"I don't really know. Maybe I had your number memorised or something." the blonde let her voice trail off.

* * *

_3 years ago, July…_

"Here you go, Vivio." Fate smiled, handing the small paper bag to her overly excited daughter.

"Wai! My very own cellphone!"

The blonde felt warm flutterings in her chest as she watched the young girl practically rip open the packaging, brandishing her new phone. It reminded her of when Lindy had gotten her her first cellphone, though admittedly, her friends' advice to "just go for the pretty one" didn't work out too well when her phone shorted out soon after. This time, the two blondes had spent hours scouring the entire store, analysing the different specifications enquiring about whether the warranty extended to battle damage.

"I don't understand why we had to get her one." huffed Nanoha, still dejected about being overridden in the decision regarding the purchase, and mostly exhausted from being dragged around the 8 story building in Akihabara for much of the afternoon. "She can't really use it on Mid anyway."

Fate gave her a smile that made all of her previous reservations melt away. If only for a little. It was totally unfair.

"Can't we spoil our daughter a little?" The blonde threw in a little wink for good measure and that effectively reduced her wife to a puddle of submissiveness.

"What is mama's number?"

Vivio's voice snapped Nanoha out of her stupor. The brunette titled her head to one side, genuinely pondering the question. It had been quite a few years since she had to give someone her Earth cellphone number, and coupled with the fact that she had used Raising Heart for most of her communication needs, she was feeling very much like one of those technologically challenged parents.

"080-7742-0955."

"You remembered?" the white mage asked incredulously. This was Fate. The same Fate who could barely work her own cellphone. The same Fate who had declared that Japanese phone numbers were too long to be properly functional. The same Fate who nearly had a nervous breakdown after mistakenly sending a 'sad face' in place of a 'happy face'. If any one of them was to be cellphone-challenged, it would most definitely have been the blonde.

The blonde in question smiled effortlessly at her wife who was now gaping at her, handing the small pink phone back to Vivio. "Of course. You're my wife. I have it memorised."

There was that smile again. The one that made everything worthwhile. The one that took her breath away. The one she would do anything just to see again.

Fate's ultimate weapon.

Satisfied at her wife's newfound agreeability, Fate turned her attention to the young girl now busy fiddling with her cellphone. "Alright, ready to go see your grandma and grandpa?"

Bright red and green eyes beamed at her. "Yes!"

* * *

_Present day…_

The white mage tossed her satchel onto the couch with a sigh. It was a long day. Coupled with meeting Fate again, Nanoha felt like all her emotional reserves had been depleted. For the entire day, she had been staring at her phone in apprehension, holding it at least an arm's length away from herself at all times, terrified that Fate might call her and ask for something innocuous like directions. All she wanted now was a nice hot bath and a nice chilled bottle of beer.

"Master, incoming call from Sacred Heart."

Maybe hold off on that drink.

"Connect."

A pair of red and green eyes materialised on the holo-screen in front of her.

"Mama!"

"Hello Vivio." It was always a joy to hear her daughter's voice at the end of a trying day. And today was particularly trying.

Following her parents' divorce, Vivio had enrolled herself in the TSAB training academy. Her choice method of coping with not getting to see one of them was to simply not see either of them. Then perhaps, she could pretend they were still a family. Her departure was not taken very well by Nanoha who had spent many days wailing in Hayate's office about how her little baby had left the nest. The daily calls from camp (as well as the rather harsh talking to by her daughter) helped the white mage come to some semblance of acceptance. Though it never did help the intense feeling of loneliness. Which was why she had begged Hayate to send her on those missions. Anything so she would not have to face returning to an empty home.

From the sound of it, Vivio was back in her bunk now, currently in her military fatigues and looking a little grimier than usual. She always tried to portray the image of a tough soldier, the naturally skilled daughter of Commander Takamachi Nanoha and Commander Fate T. Harlaown in front of her peers, but when she was back in the safe confines of her bunk, she reverted to her usual overly excited self, eager to find time to call her mothers. Though it had now been a few months since she had spoken to her blonde mama.

"Nanoha mama, did you meet with Fate mama today?"

"Yes I did, Vivio." said Nanoha, pulling her face into what she hoped was a convincing smile. "Near the training grounds during my break."

"How... is she doing?"

Vivio fidgeted uncomfortably in her seat. She had heard of Fate's accident while doing a 2 month long training mission and was not granted leave since Fate was no longer technically "family". Reading about the news from the military issued newspaper landed her 3 days in the detention barracks for attempting to leave the mission with Sacred Heart.

"She's alright. Her memory is still… not 100% yet." the auburn haired girl chose her words carefully, well aware of how distraught Vivio had been. Could still be.

"Does she… Remember me?"

Nanoha smiled melancholically. For a split second, she saw her daughter as that lost little child she who had barged into her life so many years ago.

"I'm sure she would remember Vivio. But let's give her some time to sort everything out okay?"

Her daughter sighed. "Okay, mama."

"So, tell me about training today."

Nanoha let herself get lost in conversation, deciding instantly that the few minutes she had, sprawled out on the sofa chatting with her daughter about explosions and dry powder baths, was the most bearable part of her day.

* * *

_3 years ago, July…._

"Nanoha!" Momoko smiled cheerfully, gathering her youngest daughter in a warm hug.

Nanoha grinned, returning the hug exuberantly. With the punishing schedule of a TSAB flight instructor, it had been too long since she had visited Earth. But every time she returned, her parents had made it feel like she had never left in the first place. Though this time was a little different.

"Fate-chan is here too."

"Hello Fate-chan…" Momoko turned to the blonde whose hand was still being held tightly by Nanoha. Analytical eyes fell on their clasped hands, lingering for a moment more than necessary before returning to meet burgundy.

Her smile faltered.

"Momoko-san." the blonde greeted gently with a bow.

"C-Come on in. It's hot outside." the older woman stepped aside to allow the trio through the threshold of the house, almost immediately being assaulted by a small blonde ball of energy.

"Obaachan! Look at my new phone!" Vivio exclaimed, waving the handset in her grandmother's face.

"Hai, hai, Vivio-chan." Momoko responded gently, ushering the overexcited child into the house. "Why don't you show me how to use it?"

* * *

Dinner with the Takamachi family was always a pretty noisy affair.

Fate always enjoyed her time spent with her new in-laws. It made her wonder if this was what a family was meant to be like. It had taken her quite a while to get used to the boisterous conversation and antics by Nanoha's siblings. The first time she had dinner with the Takamachis, she felt like she was being assaulted by questions. Compared to the silent isolation that accompanied her meals when she lived by herself, this was akin to having dinner in the middle of a riot. But once she had gotten used to it all, she found it addictive. Even if she didn't participate in the conversation, watching everyone else made her feel… home.

Her burgundy eyes gazed at her wife now struggling to get a spoonful of natto onto Vivio's rice while battling her daughter's flailing limbs. Her heart warmed with a nice fuzzy feeling.

If this was what having family was like, she could definitely get used to this.

Dinner concluded relatively uneventfully, aside from the near cataclysm between Nanoha, Vivio and a vegetable tempura (which was swiftly put an end to by Fate and a well timed stern glare). The blonde rose to assist Kyouya and Miyuki with clearing the table, only to be immediately sat back down at the table with a cup of hot tea and some homemade dango.

"Fate-chan, do you have a moment?"

Fate looked up at Takamachi Shiro. It was not often her father-in-law asked to speak to her without her wife's presence. She cast a glance towards the living room where Nanoha and Momoko had adjourned to, before turning her attention back to Shiro with a smile. The gentleman sat himself down on the seat across from Fate, his gaze hardening.

"What may I help you with, Otousan?"

Shiro held up his hand with a smile that was tinged with sadness.

"Please don't call me that."

Burgundy eyes widened slightly. "Ta…kamachi-san?"

Shiro mulled over his words in his head. He didn't really want to do this, especially when he knew there was a chance his daughter would never speak to him again. But one day she might realise that he was doing this all for her sake. He looked squarely at the blonde, clearing his throat before saying in a low voice "How serious are you about this… Whatever it is you have with my daughter?"

Fate was taken aback. She had always known this conversation was going to come one day, though she hoping it would be before they were married. She steeled her nerves, looking the professional bodyguard straight in the eye.

"Very serious, sir."

"Here on Earth…" the man said slowly. "In Japan… This is not something we can easily accept. People can be cruel."

The enforcer faltered slightly. Having spent much of her life growing up in Japan, she knew all too well the prejudices that society could hold. She had always felt different. Well, she was different. And she knew the sadness, the isolation that "different" would bring. But she also knew that she would do anything to protect her family.

"I would give my life for your daughter, sir."

"I don't question that. But how will you protect her, or Vivio-chan, from the world when you can't cut away discrimination and prejudice with a sword?" asked Shiro unflinchingly.

If Fate had an answer, it died in her throat as she felt the tension in the room.

"The world is not prepared for people like you."

Shiro's words cut deep. It was not how harsh it was. Or how unfeeling it was. But how it felt like an ultimatum.

"All we are asking for is for you and Momoko-san to love us as you always have."

"And all I am asking you is to think about my daughter and her daughter."

* * *

Nanoha looked worriedly at the doorway to the dining room, wondering what was taking her wife so long. But before she could get up from the couch to hunt the blonde enforcer down, her mother reappeared with two cups of tea, handing one to Nanoha. The white mage relaxed, the smell of the roasted tea coaxing her into a state of blissful nostalgia. It had been a few years since she had been back to her home on earth and she had sorely missed her family.

"You should visit more, Nanoha." the older brunette commented, sipping at her tea.

The younger Takamachi grinned apologetically. "We would but work has been pretty busy."

This was how it always went. Her mother would tell her to visit more. And she would reply that work was too hectic to come back. Then they would laugh and talk about something inconsequential and forget all about it till the next major occasion. Aside from the yearly birthday gifts and christmas gifts she had sent back from Mid, she barely had time to fulfil the pretty frequent requests from her mother to come back for a visit, or even the occasional offer to set up a marriage meeting. Nanoha had always politely replied with an apology and a bribe of Vivio's most recent photos.

"Still… You really should spend more time with your family. Here. Where you belong."

This was out not how it always went.

"Hai… It's a shame the wedding invite didn't get through."the white mage sighed, the sadness evident in her tone.

Momoko gave her cup an uncomfortable look. She stayed silent for a moment before responding quietly. "It did."

Cobalt eyes stared in shock. Nanoha's mind raced to recollect her silent anguish when she looked over at the empty seats in the front row of their wedding. Her heart had ached when Yuuji sheepishly walked her down the aisle and gave her away to Fate. And through their vows, first kiss, first dance, the niggling sadness and disappointment lingered at the back of her mind. "But you-"

"We didn't want to be there."

Nanoha's heart instantly shattered. "But.. Why?"

The older woman set her cup down on the table. It had torn her apart to have missed the wedding, seeing the photos Nanoha had sent, her daughter in the white gown she would never get to see. But it was a decision Shiro and herself had agreed on. They did it for her, even if she could not see it right now.

"Nanoha…" she began, reaching out for her daughter's hands. "Listen. No matter where you are, you are still from Earth. From Japan. From this family. And you know how people think about these… relationships here in Japan."

"You never said anything before."

"We thought it was just a phase that would pass", Momoko explained in what she hoped was a soothing voice. "One day, perhaps you'll meet the right man-"

"THAT'S ENOUGH OKAASAN."

The white mage snatched her hand away, standing very suddenly and sending the cups on the table skittering in separate directions. The older Takamachi's face drained. This was not how she wanted this talk to go.

"Nanoha, all I am saying is-"

"That you don't think what I feel is real? That I wouldn't know love from a simple infatuated 'phase'? That you won't approve of Fate-chan and I?" the younger Takamachi snapped. "We don't need your approval. We've lived perfectly fine on Mid-Childa without your approval. And we can continue doing so."

Nanoha felt a rush of anger pulse through her veins in steady, rapid beats. Her hands were clenched into fists so tight by her sides that her knuckles had flushed white as she felt her nails digging into the palm of her hand. She honestly couldn't tell what made her angrier: that her family had waited so long to voice their disapproval, or that her mother thought so lightly of her and Fate's conviction to their relationship. Either way, she knew she needed to remove herself from this room before she levelled her childhood home.

There was a soft padding of footsteps that drew both their attentions to the door. A visibly shaken looking fate reentered the room, finally locking eyes with her wife's. After the conversation with Shiro, she desperately needed a good dose of Nanoha's infectious joy. But the raging anger in those cobalt eyes that met her gaze was far from that.

"Fate-chan. Get Vivio. We're leaving."

* * *

A/N:

The conversation with Nanoha's parents may sound a little raw, I admit. But this is mostly because it is based closely on the conversation I had with my parents when I came out (against my will, if I may add). LGBT people in the world still go through plenty of discrimination and tough choices every day, which most people take for granted. What to wear. How to act. Can I hold my partner's hand.

Not all parents area readily accepting of their children's orientation, and while I don't want to turn my fics into some LGBT awareness campaign, I want my writings to convey the sad truth of the matter that doesn't come up in fiction very often: that many do not get acceptance from their parents.

A small note about flowers:

Some of you may have noticed that I've attempted to assign different flowers to our three main characters. You may wish to look up what the flowers mean, but here's what I had intended.

Nanoha - Rose : Tea coloured (I'll remember, Always), Single full bloom (I love you, I still love you)

Fate - Lily : White (It's heavenly to be with you)

Hayate - Violet : Blue (watchfulness, faithfulness, I'll always be true), white (let's take a chance on happiness)

Additionally, neat science fact, violets have a chemical compound in them that "deactivates" our scent receptors in our noses, making it impossible to smell anything else from the flower until the receptors have regenerated. I figured this ties in nicely with Hayate's brand of love in this fiction.


	4. Chapter 4

AN:

Thank you all for the kind reviews once again. Feedback is always a great way to continue improving and I am always open to any constructive feedback or suggestions you might have. Thank you especially to those who gave their support in their comments for my personal situation. It has been more than 10 years since the incident, but it resulted in over 6 years of pain for my family, and ongoing deep emotional scars that still remain to this day. Coming from a relatively conservative Asian country has not really helped my case either.

But enough about me.

My apologies if the stories don't read as well as I intended them to. It has been nearly a decade since I wrote anything of any decent length that was not work related, and hence my writing style can be a bit jarring at times. Hopefully these writer's cells in my brain reactivate themselves soon enough. I will probably go back to the earlier chapters to brush up on some of the writing when I'm done with the entire fic. Also, I do know that Nanoha's parents were very OOC in the last chapter. I deliberated for quite a few days before posting that chapter for that very reason, but eventually decided on leaving it as it is.

This chapter is going to expand a bit about the relationship between Fate and Hayate. Hayate's character has been deliberately left quite untouched till now. Hope it will help make this convoluted story easier to follow.

* * *

04:

Present day…

When Fate returned to the house, Hayate was already seated in the dining room, an assortment of documents splayed out before her in an organised chaos of TOP SECRETs and important looking reports printed on red paper. Bright blue eyes scanned across the several holo-screens in front of her, quickly analysing and sending out various reports and approvals. Her ever-crisp blue military jacket was draped over the chair next to her, making Fate briefly wonder if she had seen the brunette in anything other than her uniform.

"Busy afternoon?"

Hayate turned to look at the blonde who was now trying her best not to peep over her shoulder.

"It's nothing much. Just some old reports that needed a read through."

"IT'S ONLY 'NOTHING MUCH' BECAUSE YOU LEFT ME WITH ALL THIS WORK."

Reinforce Zwei's agitated face exploded into view, dominating a massive window on Hayate's holographic workspace, nudging out all the other documents. The general was visibly sweating as her tiny vice-commander shot her an angry look, gesturing wildly at the stacks of paperwork that practically swamped the desk behind her.

"Gomen ne, Rein-chan." Hayate apologised, hoping her sincerity would transmit effectively across the flickering holographic image. "I'll buy you chocolates tomorrow."

The tiny vice-commander pouted indignantly for a moment, her frown deepening at the offered bribe. "It had better be those nice ones from that shop in Zone 14."

"Of course."

"And none of that dark chocolate nonsense. I want proper white chocolate."

"Certainly."

"IN A PURPLE BOX."

"That can be arranged."

"Fine. We have an understanding then." Rein relented with a sigh. She brushed her hair tiredly over her shoulder, turning slightly away from Hayate with a huff. "I've cleared the rest of your appointments for today. Have a nice afternoon with Fate-san."

"Thank you Rein!"

Hayate closed the communication channel, moving to sweep the holographic workspace clean before closing it entirely. She rose from her seat, haphazardly shoving all the documents unceremoniously into her briefcase before setting the entire thing down on the ground.

"What would you like for lunch, Fate?" she asked as she smoothly walked over to the kitchen and put on the apron hung up by the wall.

"Um… Anything will do I suppose." Fate said hesitantly. Seeing the brunette so… Domestic was a disarming change from her usual workaholic military persona. "Breakfast was pretty spectacular."

Hayate chuckled from her position half in the refrigerator. "Well I did make all the stuff you used to enjoy. I'm glad they still suit your tastes."

"You made that?" asked Fate incredulously. Perhaps the general was more of a domestic goddess than she thought.

"I love cooking. I've always cooked for people I care about."

The blonde chuckled. "Cooking, washing, commanding armies… One day, you're going to make some lucky person really happy."

Hayate paused to give her a small smile before going back to hoist an immense armful of ingredients onto the counter. Fate thought she saw a flicker of sadness in those bright blue eyes before it was gone again, replaced by the usual cheerful Hayate she had always been. Or at least, for all the time Fate could remember.

"Are you really going to cook all of that?!" the blonde exclaimed, frantically grabbing random items from Hayate and shoving them back into the fridge.

The general laughed as she picked up the knife and started expertly dicing an onion, mumbling something about how the blonde could easily finish all that food by herself. Fate too rinsed off her hands and picked up a knife poised to start dicing random ingredients as well.

"Um… It's really alright, Fate." began Hayate nervously. "I can handle a little cooking by myself."

"And I'm sure I can handle being your sous chef. I don't remember if I can cook, but I'm sure I can do something as simple as cutting some vegetables. After all, I need to repay you for that amazing breakfast."

The general looked completely unconvinced, but gave in to those almost-pleading burgundy eyes and tossed the blonde a potato.

"Alright. Peel and chop that?"

"Yes ma'am!" Fate smiled with a mock salute.

The two worked quickly, cheerful banter passing lightly between them. Absorbed in her task, it almost felt completely normal. Though she really wouldn't know what normal was. She could tell Hayate was trying to make light conversation that Fate could easily participate in. Inane things like the weather, or the skyrocketing prices of bananas. But standing here, talking about idle, inconsequential things while attempting to peel a potato made the blonde feel more at home than ever. No uneasy questions, no guilty looks, no thinly veiled sad smiles. Like it didn't matter that her life as she knew it only began last week.

Hayate speared a rather massive chunk of potato from her plate of curry and turned it over, not entirely sure how best to approach it. Fate noted her own plate dotted with rather ugly lumps of potato and gave her a sheepish grin.

"I may have cut some of the pieces a little too big…."

"It's okay. You did your best!" The brunette smiled brightly, taking a big clumsy bite out of the potato with a resounding (and very raw-sounding) crunch. Her eyes watered slightly from the effort to chomp through the vegetable, managing a rather starchy, teary, but genuine grin. "This has got to be the freshest potato I have ever mauled."

Fate exploded into laughter at the sight of Hayate half attempting to speak with her mouth full, half attempting to bite through the rest of the crunchy potato. The brunette gave her a puzzled look, her face covered in specks of potato, only serving to intensify the blonde's laughter as she rolled about in her seat.

"It's not even that funny…" huffed the general, crossing her arms, the puzzled look quickly replaced by a frustrated pout.

"I'm sorry…" Fate finally wheezed between snorts. Sure it wasn't that funny, but her sides burned like she had not laughed in ages, and finally letting some of that pent up emotion go was extremely therapeutic. She wiped the last bit of mirth from the corner of her eye, turning her attention back to Hayate.

"You've got something just there…"

Before she could stop herself, the enforcer leaned forward and reached out instinctively to wipe a bit of potato off Hayate's cheek. The general immediately froze when she felt the fingertip brush gently across her cheek. She staring unblinkingly at Fate, a blush spreading across her cheeks. The blonde halted her hand mid air, suddenly very aware of what she was doing. For a few tense seconds, nobody said anything. Time screeched to a halt, leaving Fate frozen in place, so close she could feel the quiet breaths ghosting across the palm of her hand, so close she could see the terrified uncertainty in those cerulean pools.

Her hands shot back down to her sides, a rapid blush creeping across her face as she discovered just how terribly interesting her lap was.

"Ahaha…" Hayate laughed uneasily, picking up her napkin and wiping off the rest of her face. "Thanks."

Fate smiled, clearing her throat slightly in an attempt to shake off her embarrassment. When she finally willed herself to venture a look at Hayate, she found those bright blue eyes smiling back at her, the blush, while still faint, rapidly receding. The blonde returned with a crooked smile, glad for the smaller girl's inherent ability to brush off these awkward moments, despite the former's penchant for falling head first into them.

The rest of the conversation over lunch was pleasant, the earlier faux pas easily forgotten. One of the more pleasant things Fate had experienced since leaving the hospital. They chatted casually about Hayate's job which the brunette patiently explained to her. Hayate filled in some information about the life Fate used to lead. Her job. The purpose of TSAB. Though the blonde couldn't help but feel that she was getting an abridged, watered down version of her past.

"So, what did you get up to today, Fate?" asked Hayate, propping her elbows up on the table and sipping at her miso soup. "Did you get the key I left for you?"

"Oh yes I did. Thank you." the blonde responded. "I ran into Takamachi-san outside the TSAB training facility."

"Ah…" Hearing Fate call Nanoha by her last name still felt incredibly alien to Hayate. "How did that go?"

"It was okay." Fate shrugged. "She said we used to be best friends. But…"

"But…?"

"I get this weird feeling from her. Like I know her."

Hayate chuckled. "Of course you know her. You guys knew each other before you met me ages ago."

Fate shook her head. "No, I mean, like my heart knows her. Like she is someone very important to me. Every time I see her I feel like my heart is going to burst. That I might implode if I don't talk to her. Like I have to protect her. Do you know what I mean?"

Hayate smiled softly. "Yeah, I do."

"What happened between Takamachi-san and I, Hayate?"

The brunette tapped her finger on her chin, humming thoughtfully. "Did Nanoha talk to you about it?"

The enforcer sighed, leaning back into her chair. "She seemed pretty reluctant."

"Then perhaps it is her story to tell, Fate." the General smiled. Fate needed answers, but Hayate felt that those words needed to come from a certain flight instructor. Besides, she wasn't sure just how objective she could be without ripping holes in her own heart.

The blonde fell silent for a moment, toying with the last lump of rice on her plate. She was not expecting to get answers from Hayate, but figured a shot in the dark was worth it.

"Maybe I should call her."

The brunette laughed, waving an accusatory finger in Fate's general direction with a well timed wink. "You're sounding terribly like a lovesick teenage boy right now."

Fate puffed her blush dusted cheeks out indignantly at the other girl. "This is what I get for coming to you for advice."

Hayate smiled at her friend, speaking again in a much gentler tone. "But I would say, just do what your heart tells you. Your mind may not remember, but some things leave their mark on our hearts in a way we simply cannot forget."

The blonde sat thoughtfully, rolling the other girl's words in her head. She turned her burgundy gaze back to Hayate, giving her a genuine smile. "Thanks Hayate."

The brunette watched as the taller girl left the room before finally letting herself sink into the hard wooden chair with a quiet sigh. Her heart ached. It screamed and hammered against her ribs, threatening to burst through in an emotional explosion. But as always, she fought back the wave of sadness, swallowed the painful lump in her throat, and blinked back the tears that lingered at the edge of her eyes. A mirthless smile picked at the corner of her lips. How she managed to keep it together in front of Fate was beyond her. But the blonde needed a pillar of strength now, not another person loading her with baggage of her past.

And right now, that was all she was. That was all they were.

Baggage.

Schwertkreuz's hollow voice came from the device around her neck.

"Master, are you sure about this?"

"I don't know." the brunette answered honestly, looking blankly at the ceiling. "I simply don't know."

* * *

2 years ago, May

The brunette rapped her knuckles on the door impatiently for the 4th time, tapping her heeled shoe against the grey linoleum floor. Now she was starting to lose her patience.

"FATE T. HARLAOWN. OPEN THIS DOOR RIGHT NOW." yelled Hayate at the closed door, her eyes livid. "I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE. I CAN HEAR YOU BREATHING."

There was a soft rustle from behind the door before a muffled voice floated through. "You can't hear me breathe from there."

"WELL NOW I DEFINITELY KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE." bellowed the young general. The ruckus in the apartment corridor was beginning to draw attention and curious heads popped out to venture a peek at what the commotion was all about, only to hurriedly duck back in when angry blue eyes snapped over in their general direction. "OPEN UP OR I SWEAR I WILL RAGNARÖK THIS DOOR DOWN."

A disgruntled grumble came from the apartment, followed by the soft shuffling of feet, and finally the scrape of a latch opening. The heavy wooden door cracked open a fraction, revealing a small sliver of a pale face and terrifically baggy burgundy eyes.

"I'd rather you didn't do that." Fate deadpanned emotionlessly. "I'm not done paying for this apartment yet."

Hayate sighed, inviting herself into the apartment with a good shove, sending a small stack of unread letters stacked behind the door scattering across the entryway. Blue eyes slowly adjusted to the dim lighting of the small apartment before widening in shock.

"What the name of Ueda Kana?! This place is a mess!"

Fate said nothing, instead turning to shut the door before dragging her feet back into the depths of the apartment, plopping herself down on the sofa bed, and picking up the half eaten cup ramen. She wordlessly continued slurping at her noodles as Hayate went about the room, half gawking at the mess, half picking up whatever trash was on the floor and chucking it in a convenience store plastic bag she had found lying around.

The apartment was completely different from when the brunette had last visited only 2 months ago. The previously pristine room was now in a state of complete chaos. Trash, empty water bottles, ramen bowls and cups, unopened envelops littered the ground, leaving nearly no inch of the floor bare. The fridge was stocked with microwavable foods of varying expiry dates. Fate herself was dishevelled, her duller-than-usual hair lying untied in an unruly mess, her face looking far paler than she usually did. Dark circles lay around her eyes that stared blankly ahead.

The blonde let a sardonic smile snake across her lips. Go ahead. Laugh if you want. She knew how pathetic she must have looked. It had been 4 months since she had moved out from the house she shared with Nanoha and sent her the divorce papers. 2 months since she received a video letter from Vivio saying she had joined the TSAB Academy. 7 weeks since she last cleaned the house. 3 weeks since she last left the house.

Yes. She was pathetic. And she deserved nothing more than exactly this.

A pair of legs stalked into her view.

"Stand up."

Fate was tempted to ignore Hayate, but the alien sternness in her voice made her look up and into those blue eyes now brimming with determination and tears she was desperately trying to hold back.

"You're coming with me."

* * *

She had to admit, it felt good.

Scrap that. It felt AMAZING.

She let herself soak for just a few seconds longer in the cursedly amazing bath water before getting out of the onsen to dry herself off. She had almost forgotten what it felt like to have a good bath, seeing how she had pretty much neglected everything for the last few weeks. The tiny apartment she had only housed a spartan looking shower adorned with a bit of yellowish curtain for a bathing implement. Nothing like the sprawling bath here, with its private hot spring and marbled flooring.

There was a set of clothes hung up outside the bathroom with a handwritten note that saying it was for her. The blonde eyed the set of pyjamas warily, noting that it was most definitely too small for her. Fate selected to wear just the top, leaving the much too small pants on the hanger, gingerly walking back towards the massive walk-in wardrobe that led to that excessively enormous bedroom. Excessive. That's what this all was. The bath was excessive. The wardrobe was excessive. The bedroom was excessive. Everything Hayate was doing was excessive.

The blonde entered the bedroom soundlessly, noticing at once that the large screen panels on one side were now pulled open to reveal the stone garden outside, allowing the cool moonlight to spill into the room. Hayate was in her simple light blue yukata, seated on the wooden patio just beyond the screen doors, quietly sipping her cup of tea.

Burgundy eyes bore into the back of the brunette's head. What in the world was this girl thinking? Fate moved to seat herself on the patio next to Hayate, looking straight ahead at the intricate patterns painstakingly drawn into the sand. The night air was impossibly still but felt cool and calming against her skin, tickling the nape of her neck now exposed by her loosely bunned up hair.

"Where are my clothes?" It was really a demand more than a question.

"I put them in the wash." the brunette replied calmly, taking another long sip of her tea. If she had sensed any of the barely masked irritation in Fate's voice, she wasn't showing it.

"The clothes you left me are too small."

"Well, of course they are. They're mine."

"Don't you have anything bigger?"

"I can't help it if you're built like an Amazonian."

"… Not funny, Hayate."

"Am I laughing?"

Fate shot Hayate a dirty look, only to find the brunette still staring up towards the night sky. She felt another swell of anger rise in her throat but fought it back down, resorting to staring daggers at the general instead.

"Why are you doing this."

Hayate finally turned to her, combating the furious glare with her own calm and steady one. "Call it an 'intervention' if you will."

"Intrusion sounds more fitting."

"Speaking of which, I made dinner."

"I'm not hungry."

"You haven't eaten anything other than cup ramen for the last 2 months. Even if you're not hungry, your body needs nourishment."

Fate rolled her eyes, but finally allowed Hayate to lead her into the dining room, if only to shut her up. She didn't need an intervention, and she sure as hell didn't need a...

"Hayate." the enforcer began, trying to keep the raw annoyance out of her voice. "This is not dinner. This is a party for 30."

The General shrugged, continuing into the dining room towards the long wooden table that was absolutely dominated by an assortment of foods very nearly spilling off the edges. She sat herself down at one end of the table, motioning for Fate to take get place beside her.

"I didn't know what you liked, so I made a bunch of things." Hayate explained nonchalantly. "There's dessert in the refrigerator for later."

"I'm not hungry."

"Eat."

"I said I'm not hungry."

"That's an order."

The blonde stared angrily at her host, snatching the chopsticks from the table and sitting herself down forcefully. She wasn't one to give in so easily, but the general rarely pulled rank on her. Hayate smiled in a lethally gentle sort of way, picking up her own chopsticks, and looking at the enforcer with a gaze that dared her to disobey her.

"Fine." Fate growled, picking up a piece of fish and shoving it in her mouth, chewing with far more violence than it deserved. "Happy now?"

The general grinned, pushing another plate of food in the enforcer's direction. The blonde eyed the meat dish distrustfully before picking up a piece and popping it into her mouth.

The difference was noticeable.

"Hayate…" Fate began. "This is… Pretty good."

Blue eyes lit up as the brunette whipped out a notebook tucked somewhere in the folds of her obi and began furiously jotting down notes.

"What are you doing?!" spluttered Fate, nearly choking on the food in her mouth.

"Taking notes." came the simple reply.

"What for?!"

Hayate smacked the book down on the table suddenly and looked very seriously at a very startled Fate. "I'm going to be cooking meals for you from now on. I can't trust you to cook for yourself and you have way too many microwavable meals and cup ramen for me to trust you to eat healthily."

"I didn't ask you to do this for me."

"I'm preparing a room here for you so I can keep an eye on you. We can go to your apartment tomorrow to pick up whatever you need."

"Why are you doing this."

"Why do you think?"

"Because you can't mind your own business?"

"How about because I was worried about you?"

The blonde averted her gaze. So many people claiming to be 'worried about her' had knocked on her door at various times during her self imposed confinement. And she was beginning to regret opening her door this time. "I'm fine."

"You are not."

"I'm getting by."

"You had not taken a bath in 2 weeks."

"So what?"

"This is not the Fate-chan that I know."

"Well then maybe you don't know me very well." snapped Fate, almost immediately regretting it when she saw the hurt that flashed in the brunette's eyes. It's fine. Then she'll just give up and let me be. Stop wasting time on me.

"You may have given up on yourself, but I have not." Hayate said. "Whether you like it or not, I'm here for you. I care about you."

The enforcer frowned. "You're crazy, you know."

"Says the one who made a fort in their living room out of empty TV dinner boxes."

Fate muttered something under her breath but continued eating in relative silence. Bite after bite was closely monitored by blue eyes, making the blonde feel vaguely like all those galactic criminals she had helped put away. After a good hour, most of the food was either sampled or polished off, and Hayate was left with a look of accomplished satisfaction and a freshly filled notebook, Fate with a look of excessive agony.

"Right," announced Hayate, rising sharply from her seat. "Time for bed."

The brunette led a rather green looking Fate to another room. It was smaller, much simpler, with a futon already laid out on the tatami floor. Burgundy eyes quickly scanned the simple room, noting with disappointment that it happened to be next to Hayate's room.

"You can sleep here tonight." Hayate said, gesturing at the futon she had set out before. "And no, there are no other exits from the room."

Fate rolled her eyes with an audible sigh. "Okay."

"Ah, before I forget." The brunette handed the other girl a bright yellow toothbrush. "Cleanliness is next to godliness."

The taller girl eyed the proffered item, hesitantly reaching out to take it. "Yellow?"

Hayate shrugged nonchalantly as she turned to leave the room. "Take it or leave it."

The door slid shut with a clack, finally letting Fate flop unceremoniously to the ground next to the futon. She was doing perfectly fine, wallowing in self pity, drowning her sorrows in instant noodles, before Hayate had to come in and throw her entire life out of her hands and into the air. Tomorrow. Tomorrow she would walk home if she had to, and tell Hayate to take all her good intentions and shove it up her-

"Sir. Incoming call from Raising Heart."

Fate cracked open a single eye to look tiredly at the glowing bardiche next to her. Was it already 11pm? Nanoha had taken to calling her every day at precisely 11pm. Not that fate had ever answered her calls. She had already made up her mind and hearing that mellow voice would only make her heart waver. Not that she didn't already doubt her decision to leave every night at 11pm.

"Ignore it."

Perhaps she could hide out here for a couple more days.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N:

Thank you all once again for the kind reviews, favourites and follows! You all rock my world!

The story is still very much a work in progress and reading your comments often help give me some pretty awesome ideas about how to shape the story as we go along. So… More reviews!

To MangaObsessed18: Well timed question! Because you will find out in this chapter.

The timeline may be a bit confusing right now since I jump all over the shop. But this chapter picks up a year after Hayate's intervention.

The chapters will be coming out faster now, I hope. I've recently found a job (hooray!) and unfortunately that means I will not be able to write as frequently.

Just as a heads up, the rating may change to M in the next chapters, just to be extra safe. Nothing too graphic, but I've been censored for much less than that. So if you don't see the fic on the main list anymore, just search under "all ratings" to find it.

* * *

**05:**

_1 year ago, January... (1 year later)_

"Are you sure you want to do this?"

Fate gave the brunette a half frustrated look as she stepped into the transportation circle. The bright yellow luminescence that emanated from the symbol on the ground threw its brilliant glow on every surface in the room, most notably on the face of a certain general which was now contorted with some sort of worry. Over the last year of living (or semi-involuntary imprisonment) in the Yagami household, Fate had only just begun to get accustomed to this particular expression of Hayate's, an expression she wore quite often when it came to matters involving the blonde.

"For the last time, yes."

"Okaaaaay," inhaled Hayate, stepping in next to Fate. She was honestly quite surprised that Fate had volunteered to join her on this trip back to Earth, though her surprise was quickly supplanted by concern. The enforcer had come a long way from the sorry state Hayate had found her in the year before, but the road to recovery was long and riddled with setbacks.

She sent a sharp nod in Rein's direction and the tiny vice commander powered up the transportation circle. In a flash of blinding light, they were gone.

When the bright light faded, Fate was immediately assaulted by a wall of freezing air, a massive contrast from the warm interior of the TSAB headquarters just moments ago.

"FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!" Hayate exclaimed loudly, fumbling to pull her thick military coat around her as her string of curses left her lips in little puffs of exhaled mist. "I nearly forgot how cold Tokyo gets in January."

Fate pulled her own coat closer, trying to orientate herself while exhaling into her hands to warm them. The snow around them sat in a fresh crisp blanket of pristine white, covering much of the frozen vegetation of the park. The transportation circle had seared a perfect circle of runes around them, steam still rising slowly from the ground. Fate recognised this park. It was the same one they had bid Reinforce goodbye back when they were just children. Her gaze turned to Hayate who was now attempting to rip open a packet of heat packs with her teeth.

Coming back to Earth still felt so raw for her. It had already been one and a half years since she last visited, the last time being the family visit with Nanoha that set everything into motion. Since then, she had done everything in her power to avoid a trip back to this planet. Everywhere she turned were memories of Nanoha. In a city she knew like the back of her hand, in streets so familiar, she had never felt more alone.

Fate felt her knees buckle slightly as her stomach lurched with the all too familiar anxiety.

Maybe she wasn't ready for this yet.

Fate's eyes snapped back up as she felt a small squeeze on her shoulder. Hayate smiled reassuringly at her, as if reading her mind.

"It's going to be okay. I'll be here with you every step of the way."

"I'm fine-"

"Fate-chan." Hayate levelled at her in a tone that left little room for negotiation. "I'm not going anywhere."

Fate paused for a moment before relenting with a quiet exhale. She had never liked showing weakness to anyone, much less fluffy, intangible weakness like this. But Hayate had seen her at her worst, and the enforcer figured that attempting to scrap together any semblance of dignity in front of her would be a futile endeavour. That being said, it was much easier being around the brunette than any of their other companions. No fronts. No pretences. She could be as catastrophic an emotional wreck as she wanted. And in her world of strict military decorum and the crushing weight of expectations from the people around her, that was truly liberating.

Satisfied the blonde was not going to run off screaming or up chuck in the bushes somewhere, Hayate led the way out of the park, throwing the occasional glance towards Fate. The trek to the apartment was a short one, though it felt much longer with the cold and rapidly fading light. Hayate clicked the door open just as the street lamps began to flicker on along the streets, illuminating the mild beginnings of a snowfall.

The apartment was incredibly well kept for a place she only used once or twice a year on her short visits. Hayate likened the house to something more akin to a hotel than anything else, christening it her "summer home for lowly paid TSAB generals until I can afford that beach house on world #78".

The brunette disappeared into her old bedroom, leaving Fate to her own devices. The blonde nursed the tiny heat pack Hayate had given her, cradling it in her palms as she slowly made her way around the living room littered with photographs. Most of them were of the Wolkenritter and Hayate back when she still needed a wheelchair to get around. Understandable since they were pretty much her only family. It was almost like a blast from the past, being reminded of a time long gone but hardly forgotten.

She paused at a particular photo set out on the end table. It was one of Hayate, Nanoha and herself back in high school. Burgundy eyes lingered on that brightly smiling face, tracing it tentatively with her finger. How long had it been since she had last seen her? Every day apart from her did little to dull the ache of separation, but she was learning to deal with the pain. If only they had known what would happen between them. But even if they could turn back the clocks, go back to when it all started, Fate would have gladly done it all over again. A lifetime of loneliness was well worth the little time she had with the white mage.

"This is for you, Fate-chan."

Fate started at the sound of Hayate's voice, looking up from the photograph at the brunette who was now standing in front of her, pushing something in her general direction. Her eyes widened at the smooth material being pressed into her hands.

"I can't possibly accept this, Hayate…" she frowned. It felt almost exactly like 7 years worth of enforcer pay checks. Not to mention she had not put one on in years.

"You can pay me back by looking hot in it." winked Hayate. "Besides, the day simply won't be complete without it."

The blonde turned a bright red, wisely deciding to politely take the proffered item before retreating back into the bedroom. Hayate watched the taller girl, not letting her well-practiced smile falter until the door closed. She could tell this trip was quite the struggle for Fate and already had her reservations about bringing her along on her yearly new year's eve trip to Earth. But now that they were here, she was determined to push the enforcer through this next phase of her "Hayate's Rehabilitation Menu".

"Fate-chan, are you alright in ther-"

Hayate stopped mid sentence to stare at the blonde who now entered the room. The black yukata with intricate gold patterns woven into the material hugged her form gently in all the right places, the dark material bringing out her flawless skin, making the long hair she had twisted into a simple bun simply radiate.

She was spectacular.

Right down to the half frustrated, half sheepish look she was giving Hayate as she held the two ends of her gold obi belt.

"I can't remember how to tie this…"

Hayate grinned, shaking herself out of her daze to move behind the blonde. She gently took the ends of the obi from Fate, making quick work of it. The blonde closed her eyes, feeling the occasional tug of Hayate working on the bow, letting distant memories flood in. Fate rarely wore a yukata, much to Nanoha's chagrin, and whenever she did, it was at the insistence of the white mage. She always had trouble with tying her obi, but Nanoha had always been there to give her a hand.

_"Fate-chan, you have to learn how to tie this for yourself too!"_

_"But if I do, then Nanoha won't tie it for me anymore."_

"All done."

The enforcer snapped out of her thoughts as Hayate circled her once to admire her handiwork. The general herself was being a bit of a head turner. The shorter girl's white yukata was embroidered with light blue snow flakes and held together with a navy blue obi that brought out her eyes.

Fate was the first to speak.

"You look nice."

"You're not too bad yourself, Fate-chan." the general said with a cheeky wink. "I see you've paid me back in full."

The blonde positively glowed bright red, spluttering something incoherent about the indecency of winking. Hayate laughed, picking up her bag from the couch.

"Shall we get going?"

* * *

"Sorry for the wait!"

Fate looked up from her seat on the bench to see Hayate reappearing with two small plates. The place was absolutely packed with people and she was amazed they even managed to find this single empty bench a little way from all the hustle and bustle of the festivities. The road leading up to the shrine was ablaze with light and lined with small stalls selling an assortment of foods or offering traditional games to the throngs of people milling about. From here, the sound of the crowd diminished to a low hum, making Fate feel more like a detached observer than an actual participant in the new year's eve festival.

"Thank you, Hayate." the enforcer smiled, taking a plate from Hayate. "I really like yakisoba."

The brunette grinned as she sat herself down next to Fate. She had to not-so-gently elbow a housewife or two to just get into the queue for the fried noodles, making her acquisition all the more fragrant with the added flavour of victory. It was an absolute mad house down there, and she was glad that Fate offered to sit and wait at the bench instead of becoming collateral damage.

"Lucky!"

She whipped out the slightly worn notebook from her obi and excitedly scribbled something down.

"When are you going to let up with that?" sighed Fate.

"One day, when you have a completely ginger free meal accompanied by green tea with one sugar, you will thank me."

"It's creepy you know so much."

"I'll take that as a compliment to my attention to detail."

"Some people would call it stalking." the blonde stated, taking a bite out of her meal. It had been a while since she had been to a festival. The hectic and completely unpredictable schedule of an enforcer gave her little opportunity to plan for these things. But now that she was here, it felt like a thin shadow of those laughter filled days from long ago. The air around her hung thick with melancholy, threatening to choke her up with memories she was not prepared to deal with.

"Fate-chan… You don't have to smile if you don't feel like smiling."

The blonde blinked at Hayate before relaxing the strained smile she had on her face, letting herself slouch a little in her seat. It was all too easy now, slipping on that fake smile like a well worn mask. She had long tired of the awkward tip-toeing around her and strained conversations trying not to mention Nanoha in front of her. With this mask, she could pretend everything was okay again. That she simply didn't care anymore. It was easier for everyone that way. And for the most part, it worked perfectly. Except on a certain brunette.

"Is it that obvious?"

Hayate smiled warmly at her friend. "Fate-chan's smile is beautiful. Anything short of the real deal is pretty obvious."

The blonde blushed, turning her attention to her food instead, picking at the noodles.

* * *

The streets will filled with throngs of people all moving in an orderly manner towards the temple. The sounds in the air, the smells of the various stalls, the faint music in the air mixed with the low murmur of the crowd. Fate felt a slim hand grasp hers tightly and looked up to see Hayate smiling at her.

"Don't lose me."

The blonde gave her a small smile, returning the slight hand squeeze and following the brunette as they wove their way slowly through the thick crowd. Even in the biting cold of the January night air, the temple crowded with people felt stuffy and warm. Hayate pulled them both to a prime position near the front, letting go of Fate's hand to clap her own together twice explosively before squeezing her eyes tight, muttering a million words a second under her breath. She had a lot to pray for and very little time.

The enforcer held back a chuckle, wondering if many patrons prayed as vigorously as Hayate did considering the number of startled wide-eyed stares she got from nearby worshippers. Then she too closed her eyes in silent reflection. Fate opened her eyes, slowly looking back up at the altar a fair way from the barrier. She wasn't a particularly religious person. Knowing what existed beyond the stars and that no deity was involved in her own very scientific birth left little for faith to fill in. But living the life she had now was nothing short of a miracle to her. And that, she supposed, was worth thanking some higher power for.

Hayate handed the blonde a small wooden plaque gesturing excitedly at the set of tables and pens set up along the side. Fate picked up the pen and without hesitation, wrote her wish on the _ema_ in neat kanji.

"What did you pray for Fate-chan?" asked Hayate, hanging up her ema on the nearly filled racks. "You seemed pretty certain about what you wanted."

Fate smiled, adjusting her own wooden plaque next to the brunette's. "World peace."

"What? Are you being serious? Mou… Next thing you're going to tell me is that you're preparing to participate in the next Miss Japan…"

"What, you think I don't have a shot at winning?"

"I'm just saying they don't have a she-hulk category..."

The pair left the shrine, disappearing back into the festivities as the sound of their light banter mingling with the low murmur of the crowd. The flickering light from the lanterns cast fleeting orange glows on their two newly hung ema.

_"Nanoha and Vivio's happiness."_

_"I wish for Fate-chan to smile again."_

(A/N: "ema" are wooden wishing plates found in many Japanese shrines on which patrons can write their wishes. These are later offered to the deity by the priests so they may be fulfilled)

* * *

_Present day, June..._

"So Fate, today we're going to assess your competency before we reissue Bardiche to you."

Hayate's voice crackled to life over the speakers in the room as the heavy steel doors shut behind the blonde. The simulation room in TSAB was colossal. The steel clad room ran an expansive half a kilometre across and several storeys up, with several large dents carved into the surfaces where previous weapons testing had taken its toll. Fate traced her foot gingerly across the lip of a particularly nasty looking gash in the ground next to her, wondering if being put in a room like this one was really necessary to test her powers.

"Okay… So… How do I use this thing?" Fate asked, quizzically looking at the golden triangle in her hand. It seemed to be pulsing with a soft, calming golden light that seemed nearly comforting to the blonde. Like an old friend she had once known.

_"Just tell me what to do, Sir."_

Fate visibly jumped at the mechanical voice that erupted from the tiny device.

"WHAT IN THE NAME OF EVERYTHING THAT IS BEAUTIFUL? YOU SPEAK?!"

_"Yes Sir."_

"Okay…." the blonde frowned, struggling to settle her racing heart back to normalcy. She didn't know what she was expecting when she came into this room. Guns? Swords? Tanks? Definitely not a talking triangle.

"Fate, you need to set up before you can use it."

"And how do I do that?"

"Just go 'BARDICHE, SEEEEEETTTTT UPPP!"

She winced at the positively saccharine voice Hayate had chosen, the rusty speaker adding salt to the wound with a loud whine of feedback. Burgundy eyes regarded Bardiche warily, not entirely sure what she was getting herself into. Fate cleared her throat nervously, saying in a steady voice:

"Bardiche. Set up."

"NOT LIKE THAT!" the brunette's voice boomed over the PA system again. "Do it more like… LIKE A MAGICAL GIRL."

"What?! What does that even mean?!"

"MORE ENTHUSIASM DAMMIT!"

Fate glared at the small speaker set into the wall behind her before rolling her eyes in exasperation. She felt ridiculous enough as it was, and she was almost certain Hayate was video-recording this entire process for "future reference". Her gaze fell on the glowing device again, rolling it once over in the palm of her hand. The weight felt familiar, the cool metal fitting naturally into the callouses on her hand. Fate raised Bardiche close to her face, staring into the glowing and ebbing light as if being drawn to it. Her lips barely moved as her voice left them in a soft whisper.

_"Bardiche, Set up."_

There was a brilliant golden light that filled the massive training room, nearly whiting out the army of security cameras. Electricity crackled in the air, fizzing and popping angrily as bright arcs zig zagged across the room, scorching the walls. The automatic vents started up, whirring loudly as they drew the smoke out of the room, tracing the silhouette of a lone figure standing amidst impossibly bright light. The yellow glow slowly faded, revealing Fate standing in her full barrier jacket with an extremely surprised look on her face.

"Looking good, Harlaown!"

Fate blushed at Hayate's voice coming over the PA system. She would have to have a word with the general later about wolf whistling over speakers. But for now, she had more pressing matters to attend to. Like the fact that she was very suddenly standing there in a completely different attire, a long staff now nestled in her hands.

"So what now?" She could get used to this talking-to-a-triangle thing.

_"You may ask me to go into any of my combat modes, Sir."_

"Like… A melee mode or something?"

"SCYTHE SLASH!"

"Woah!" Fate nearly shrieked, stumbling backwards as the golden blade of light erupted from the end of Bardiche, cleaving a clean chunk out of the flooring. The reinforced metal creaked unhappily as the edge of the cut sizzled and promptly melted.

There was a chuckle over the speakers. "See? You're a natural!"

"I wouldn't call this being a natural…." muttered Fate, staring at the scythe that had just materialised. There was a fiery energy pulsing through her veins, energising her, filling her with an invigorating buzz.

_"Sir, I can maximise output for this exercise if you command it."_

"This isn't your full power yet?" asked Fate. She had to admit, all her earlier anxiety aside, she was getting quite the kick out of this. Despite its immense size, the weapon felt light in her hands. She could probably get the hang of this. How bad could it be? "Let's see what you can do then-"

"ZANBER FORM!"

Hayate face faulted from her seat in the viewing gallery as the simulation room filled with a terrified scream and parts of a nearby completely obliterated wall.

"Oh dear…."

* * *

"Well, don't be too glum, Fate." Hayate said, taking a hefty bite out of her sandwich. "It happens to most people the first time they use a magical device."

Technically, she wasn't lying. Most people found it difficult to get the hang of working with a magical device, and it often took weeks of training before they could full control it, let alone harness its power in a weaponised form. Though most people wouldn't completely wreck the simulation room and its 5 meter thick steel walls.

"Well, this isn't my first time, is it?" growled Fate angrily, smacking her canned drink down onto the table a little harder than she wanted to. Hayate blinked at her before her expression softened again.

"Sorry, Hayate…" the blonde mumbled. Her frustrated outbursts were not exactly rare, but she could never stay angry when the brunette was giving her that look. The one of complete and utter acceptance and forgiveness. The one Fate felt she did not deserve at all.

"You just need more practice with Bardiche. It knows you. And as much as we call it a magical device, it really is more like a two-way street."

"Yeah… I guess so…" Fate frowned. After the assessment, they had decided put an extremely restrictive limiter on her magical device, allowing her to carry it on the condition that all commands were to be approved by Schwertkreuz. Honestly, she was mostly surprised they let her leave the room with Bardiche, considering just how destructive she had been in that short half an hour. Though she had a sneaky suspicion that a certain general had a lot to do with 'persuading' the rest of the panel to see things her way.

"GENERAL YAGAMI HAYATE!"

Hayate very nearly dropped her sandwich onto her lap, managing to somehow catch it in the most ungainly manner possible as Rein's voice thundered over the suddenly open communication channel. Hayate knew this tone and this tone meant trouble.

"What is it, Rein?" the brunette blinked innocently while attempting to flash her vice commander with an uncomfortably wide smile.

"Oh it's nothing really… You are probably very busy if you could forget that YOU'RE 17 MINUTES LATE FOR YOUR MEETING WITH THE WAR COUNCIL."

Hayate's face fell.

"Oh crap."

With a hurried goodbye, Hayate shoved the remainder of her sandwich into her mouth before taking off down the corridor, the communication channel floating along beside her yelling strings of words unsuitable for publishing. Fate's gaze lingered down the hallway they had disappeared before returning to the stew on her plate. Or what she thought was stew. Military food could not be defined as 'delicious' by any stretch of the imagination, but at the very least they could have at least tried to make it look like food. She pushed the plate away, a look of utter dissatisfaction on her face.

"Never go for the stew."

Fate looked up from her heap of grey slop to see Nanoha taking a seat across from her.

"What?"

"Never go for the stew." the flight officer repeated, opening the small bento box she had. "First rule of the TSAB cafeteria. No one knows what sort of meat they use. Though my money's on larvae from World #297."

Fate made a face. "I would have thought the first rule was we do not talk about the stew."

Nanoha laughed, her voice sending delightful tingles down the blonde's spine, much to the latter's confusion. Something pinged in Fate's subconscious, making her heart beat just those few beats quicker, her stomach fill with butterflies, and her mind fade into a warm fuzzy mush.

At that moment, Fate decided she quite liked smiling Nanoha.

At the very same moment, Nanoha's thoughts, along with someone else's, was on a slightly less fluffy tangent.

_"Vita… What in the world were you thinking?!"_

_"You'll thank me for this later."_

_"Or kill you…"_ Being very suddenly and very forcibly shoved towards her ex-wife was not exactly the way she had planned for her lunch break to go. Her mind raced for what she hoped was a good opening line. And the one that left her lips was "never go for the stew"? She mentally smacked her head against the table. Smooth, Takamachi. Very smooth.

_"Just be yourself."_

_"As opposed to? A badger?"_

_"The spluttering idiot you usually are around Fate-san."_

_"Why are you helping me anyway? Aren't you supposed to be on Hayate's side?" _The words sounded more bitter coming from her than she had intended.

_"Of course I am."_

_"What's that supposed to mea-"_

"What do you have, Takamachi-san?"

Nanoha whipped her head around to see Fate gazing inquisitively at her bento box, the aroma of home cooked food somehow managing to pierce through the lingering smell of burnt mystery meat. For a brief moment, however fleeting, she thought she saw a flash of someone she had known long ago. Those curious eyes. That quiet voice. It was all too easy to believe that this was the Fate she loved and lost.

And just for a while, she let herself believe.

She quirked a brow. "Would you… Like to try some?"

"Oh no, I couldn't possibly-"

Fate was unceremoniously cut off by a small cube of meat at the end of a pair of chopsticks now drawing circles in front of her face. "Say ahhhh."

The blonde felt her cheeks heat up incredibly, opening her mouth to stutter some polite refusal when the offending piece of chicken was deftly shoved into her mouth. Fate felt the colour drain from her face, quickly replaced by an interesting hue of green.

"Nyahahaha sorry fate-chan!" Nanoha laughed as the other girl struggled to swallow the piece of food in her mouth. "You never did like ginger."

Fate barely registered what the white mage was saying as she attempted to wash the taste of ginger out with a hefty helping of "stew", all at once deciding that was definitely a bad idea. But right now, it mattered little. This was the most relaxed their interactions had been, and the blonde felt a tinge of warm nostalgia. Like this was how it had always been between them. How it should be.

_"Master, incoming call from Graf Eisen."_

Nanoha stretched out, quickly popping a meatball in her mouth as she shut the lid on her bento box. "Well, that's my cue to head back now. We've got new trainees coming in today."

That wasn't too bad. Short and relatively painless. She was mostly just glad that Fate had not noticed how her heart was going on at a ridiculous rate. Or how her hands were all clammy. Or how she was desperately resisting the urge to just lean forward and...

It was definitely time to bid a hasty tactical retreat before she did something properly stupid.

"Takamachi-San..." a slightly unsure voice stopped Nanoha as she rose from her seat. She turned to see Fate looking at her with strangely familiar eyes filled with a curious mix of determination and trepidation. "Maybe we could... Hang out or something."

Nanoha regarded fate's hesitant words. "Are you sure?"

Fate gave her a lop sided grin. "Positive. We were best friends after all."

* * *

_3 years ago, March..._

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure. It looks exactly like it does in the picture."

"I think it should be a bit more to the left."

"Stop touching it!"

"If you'd just hold still for a second, I would stop touching it!"

Fate struggled valiantly for an extra few seconds before dropping her arms resignedly to her sides, finally relenting to the onslaught that was Hayate. The brunette took a step backwards, scrutinizing the tie intensely before moving it a millimetre to the left.

"All done!" she announced with a flourish, admiring her handiwork. Not too bad for just 20 minutes of adjustments without so much as reaching for the ruler she had brought.

The blonde frowned. "It looks exactly the same as before."

"Meh." Hayate waved dismissively. "It was good before. But now... Now it is perfect. And you most definitely want to be perfect today."

Fate looked at herself again in the mirror, hardly recognising the suave looking officer staring back at her. Having witnessed first hand the weeks of agonising wedding dress shopping with Nanoha, she had opted to wear her officer's ceremonial full dress. It being mostly white definitely helped when it came to convincing Nanoha that wearing this would be better than tailor fitting a suit or hunting for the perfect dress.

The crisp white uniform seemed to only accentuate the lines of the blonde's body, the perfectly white double breasted coat adorned with varying medals from her conquests as an enforcer over the years sat atop her white dress shirt and the simple black silk tie. The cuffs of the coat were marked with three solid gold stripes and a star signifying her rank. The entire ensemble hung over a similarly white skirt starched to perfection, and shoes shined to the nth degree.

Hayate managed to convince her that at least light makeup was in order, if anything to mask the evidence of the rip roaring bachelorette's party she had been a mostly unwilling participant of the night before. She could almost swear she could still see the edges of the dark circles around her eyes. Her long blonde hair was tied back so tightly into a high ponytail that she thought her face was going to stay that way.

But despite all that, she couldn't be happier.

"Any last words in your last moments of singlehood?"

The general was also in full regimental dress, though the uniform of the ground force had much less white in it. A jet black jacket with gold buttons and epaulettes with the 2 stars of her rank adorning them. The freshly pressed shirt was tucked into her dark blue pencil skirt, with the black tie completing the attire.

Fate gave her a lop sided grin. "Only that I can't wait for the end of it."

Her best man (or woman) sighed, rolling her eyes in mock exasperation. "Such a sap."

There was a soft knock on the door and Signum stepped in.

"Testarossa, Master Hayate, it's time."

The brunette turned to give Fate an overexcited thumbs up, following her pink haired knight out, leaving Fate alone with her thoughts for the first time in days. With the brunette gone, she was suddenly much more aware of the thundering of her heart, the cold clamminess of her hands, and the almost imperceptible tremble in her fingers. The blonde took a deep breath and stepped through the doors into the massive hall.

The central Cranagan Ceremony Hall was filled with rows upon rows of seats, now packed with familiar, and some not so familiar, faces. Bright sunlight filtered through the large windows high up in the domed ceiling, flooding the hall with an ethereal golden glow. Flowers were literally everywhere they could be hung, permeating the space with the distinct smell of lilies and roses. A long red carpet stretched out in the middle of the sea of seats, standing out in the very white environment.

Fate took her place at the front of the hall next to Hayate, struggling to stay calm as she felt the eyes of every guest train on her. She felt a warm hand give her shoulder a reassuring squeeze, turning to see the familiar smile and bright blue eyes. She instinctively returned the smile, feeling her pulse slow as the tension in her faded just a little.

The blonde smiled warmly. "Thanks, Hayate."

The brunette quirked a brow. "For what?"

"For everything."

The loud sounds of the organ reverberated through the hall, drawing their attention to the large oak doors down the far end.

* * *

The phone rung through to the answering machine again. Slim fingers gripped tightly at a fold in her dress.

"Still not picking up?"

Nanoha hastily dabbed at the slight hint of tears forming at the corners of her eyes, turning to look at Yuuno who was quietly shutting the door as he stepped into the room.

"The invite must have gotten lost in transit." the flight instructor said with a sad smile. "And it was pretty short notice anyway."

Yuuno chuckled. "That's true. I suppose most people wait more than a month after proposing to get married. Well, if Fate-san didn't have to go off on that mission next month, we wouldn't have to rush like this."

"Well, work is work. Can't expect the universe to go on hold just for a wedding."

"I suppose." Yuuno smiled. "Everything looks amazing though. I don't know how you guys managed to pull it off so quickly. You and Fate make a great team. I can't think of a more fitting pair."

"Thanks Yuuno," Nanoha said. "And thanks for doing this for us."

The young man grinned, rubbing the back of his head. "If giving you away to Fate-San is the least I could do, I am honored the both of you asked me to do this."

Green eyes widened slightly as Nanoha suddenly caught Yuuno in a tender hug. His expression softened as he gently returned the hug. He was genuinely surprised when he got the call from a tearful Nanoha only two days ago, asking if he would be willing to play a role in the wedding. But, if it was for Nanoha, he would travel halfway across the galaxy at the drop of a hat.

"Are you ready?"

"No," Nanoha said, pushing slightly away from her old friend. "But I can't think of anything else I'd rather be doing than this."

Yuuno smiled, holding out his arm. "Then let's not keep your bride waiting."

The heavy wooden doors creaked open and the sound of the organ hidden deep in the high ceiling flooded into the room. She felt her feet move on their own, propelling her steadily down the red carpet. Nanoha and Yuuno walked slowly down the aisle, the happy smiles of friends lining the pews on either side. It was perfect. Everything was perfect. But her cobalt eyes were only fixed on the 4 empty seats in the front row.

Her gloved fingers tightened imperceptibly around Yuuno's arm. This was really a lot harder than she thought it would be. She felt a larger hand clasp over hers, giving her a reassuring squeeze, prompting her to glance at Yuuno Who was giving her a warm smile.

She took a deep breath, turning her gaze to the blonde who was now staring at her with a sort of stunned amazement, a nervous smile on her face. Nanoha felt her breath catch, a gentle blush dusting her cheeks. Fate was breathtakingly handsome, and it took every ounce of strength not to run towards her.

Yuuno released Nanoha's arm from his own, handing her over ceremonially to the blonde who gingerly took the brunette's hand in her own. With that familiar warmth in her hand, she felt her earlier insecurities melt away, all the sadness and hesitation bleb away until all that was left was the certainty that this was it. This was what she really wanted.

Cobalt clashed with burgundy as the two locked gazes, the sound of the crowd fading into the background, the voice of the city official becoming little more than a low hum. They could barely even remember saying "I do".

"You may now kiss the-"

Before the city official could finish his sentence, Nanoha launched herself at Fate, pressing her lips enthusiastically against her new wife's. The crowd erupted into deafening cheers as streamers exploded across the hall, cascading down on everything in ribbons of gold and silver.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Thank you once again for all the reviews! This fic, small and new as it may be, is gaining some following and I would like to thank everyone for sticking with me this far.

This chapter will be the turning point.

* * *

**06:**

"So... Big date?"

Fate shot Hayate a look through the reflection in the mirror before continuing to attempt to fix her hair in a way that didn't look so.. Strange.

"It's just lunch, Hayate."

"Uh huh. Sure. And that's why you've been preening for the last 2 hours."

The blonde frowned. "I'm not preening. I just… Can't get my hair to… GAHHH! WHY IS THERE SO MUCH OF IT?!" Fate let out a strangled groan of despair before flopping despondently onto the dresser, silently cursing past Fate for leaving her with such copious amounts of hair to contend with. She didn't even know why she was getting so worked up over this 'just lunch'. From fussing about picking out an outfit (while vigorously refusing Hayate's attempts to put her in the french maid outfit) to attempting to struggle with the general's expansive makeup collection, she was beginning to think she would never get out of the house in time. Maybe she should just cancel…

Hayate chuckled, picking the comb up from the dresser and pulling the two black ribbons from Fate's twin tails, letting her hair cascade down her back in a river of gold. Fate sat upright again as felt the gentle strokes of the brush running through her hair, hazarding a glance at Hayate through the mirror. The general seemed thoroughly engrossed in her task, though a hint of sadness tugged at the small smile she had on her lips. She gently smoothed the brush over the tresses, before tying it in a loose bow at the lower end of her hair.

Fate eyed herself in the mirror. Now she looked so much like the Fate in those pictures of their friends Hayate had scattered around the house. It was almost like looking at a ghost.

"Thanks..." the blonde mumbled, turning her gaze away from her own reflection.

Hayate laughed brightly. "No problem! As long as you remember to fill me in on all the juicy details when you're back."

Fate threw a glance at the clock in the room. With all her previous preparations, she was about to leave half an hour later than she had planned to. "If I even get there on time…"

There was a sharp jingle of metal and the enforcer looked up just in time to catch a set of keys tossed in her direction.

"Be careful with her okay?" Hayate grinned at her. "It's been a while since she's gone out."

Fate gave her a puzzled look as the brunette ushered her out of the room and out the front door, pattering on about how much time she and Signum had spent washing and maintaining "her". The blonde stared blankly at the closed door for a moment before turning her attention to the gravel driveway ahead of her. Or where the gravel driveway should have been.

Parked squarely in the porch was a sleek black sports car. Smooth surfaces dipped into sharp angles where the sunlight glinted alluringly off the metallic paint. It was almost seductive.

And Fate simply couldn't resist.

She ran a hesitant hand over the side of the car, feeling the cool metal under her palm. It was almost exciting. Almost familiar. The door hissed open with a mechanical click, swinging outwards in one smooth motion. Fate slid easily into the driver's seat, the leather bucket seat fitting her perfectly. As soon as she sat down, the door shut itself again as the lights on the dashboard glimmered into action.

"Good evening, Sir. Welcome back." The sultry electronic female voice intoned as the engine purred to life with a less than subtle roar. Fate placed her hands squarely on the leather clad steering wheel, easing the car out of the driveway. She could practically feel the powerful engine rumble under her foot as she opened up the throttle and sped off down the street.

She could get used to this.

* * *

"Did you wait long?"

Fate looked up to see Nanoha sliding into the car seat next to her. They had chosen to meet at someplace Fate could definitely find - the TSAB training facility, making the blonde feel like her life was beginning to revolve around this place. Though judging by the lack of any signs of a social life in her apartment, her life had probably revolved around this place for a long time.

"Not at all." Fate smiled nervously, pulling the car away from the kerb. "So where is this mystery place we're headed to?"

Nanoha grinned, pushing some buttons on the console and bringing up a navigation screen. "I figured I should at least try to redeem the name of mid childian stew. It's really quite good when not coming out in a mess tin."

The blonde chuckled, following the navigations directions as the towering blocks of downtown mid childa peeled past the windows, the silence in the car comfortable for once. Fate couldn't help but feel a comforting familiarity about this, albeit tinted with a pang of heartache she could not explain. She cast several sidewards glances at the brunette who was busying herself with adjusting various knobs and buttons on her seat. The blonde briefly wondered when the other girl got so comfortable in this vehicle just as a light chime from the navigation system informed her they were finally at their destination.

The restaurant itself was not a terribly fancy place. In fact, it looked like a regular family restaurant tucked away within a quaint housing estate, replete with homely looking curtains and simple checkered tablecloth. A few other tables were occupied, the sound of their light chatter and clinking cutlery muffled against the cherry oak panelled walls. A willowy gentleman glided to the entrance of the restaurant, clicking his heels smartly as he came to a stop in front of the two guests.

"Commander Takamachi, Commander Harlaown," began the waiter smoothly, taking a grand looking bow that looked slightly misplaced in a casual setting like this. "Your usual table is ready."

He led the pair to a small table towards the back of the restaurant, away from the rest of the rather sparse lunchtime crowd. He pulled out both their chairs for them, delicately setting two glasses of something bluish on the table before turning to Nanoha.

"The usual for both of you, Commander?"

Nanoha gave him a polite smile and a quick nod, sending the man trotting off towards the kitchen. Finally alone, she turned back to the blonde sitting across from her who was now scrutinising her quietly fizzing drink. Blue didn't strike Fate as a usual colour for edible things, and coupled with the fact that the liquid was making occasional popping noises, she was not sure how keen she was on ingesting this mysterious beverage.

The flight instructor giggled at the look of serious contemplation painted across Fate's face. "It's totally safe, Fate-chan." she reassured, lifting her glass to her lips and taking a long draw. The blonde furrowed her brow at her own glass before taking a tentative sip. The liquid fizzled pleasantly on her tongue, leaving a slightly sweet taste behind. Perhaps blue could be edible after all.

"Do you come here often, Takamachi-san?" she began, setting her drink back down on the table.

Nanoha gave the other girl a small smile. "Well, we both did. A few years ago."

Fate made a small hum of acknowledgement, her attention drawn to the waiter who was now returning with two bowls of something that smelled simply heavenly. He set the two portions of stew in front of the pair, cracking a bit of pepper in it before taking his leave. Fate took a deep breath, shovelling a bit of the brown sauce into her mouth. Burgundy eyes widened visibly as a smile spread across her face.

"This is really good, Takamachi-san!"

"I'm glad you like it, Fate-chan." Nanoha smiled. "It's pretty easy to make at home."

"Could you teach me?"

"Eh?" The brunette cocked her head to one side with a puzzled expression. Fate had never volunteered to cook anything, let alone ask to be taught a new dish. Then again, this was not the Fate-chan she knew.

Fate averted her gaze to stare at the stew she was now pushing about her bowl with a spoon, well aware of the blush that was now wrecking havoc on her face. She didn't know what possessed her to utter such a request, but if it meant prolonging the time she had with this mysterious brunette… "I'm not very good at cooking, and I wanted to cook something for Hayate to thank her for everything she has done for me so far."

Nanoha's smile faltered imperceptibly.

_Hayate._

"Ah… I suppose I could write down a simple recipe for it…"

The enforcer returned a wide grin, excitedly pushing her napkin and a pen towards Nanoha. "Thank you, Takamachi-san."

The flight instructor hesitantly reached for the napkin, numbly scratching the pen against the material as she jotted down some ingredients. Her heart ached. Did Fate remember Hayate when she couldn't even remember her name? After all they had been through, after all the love they had shared, did it all boil down to this?

"Takamachi-san…" a soft voice interrupted her thoughts. "If you'd like to do this another day, that is fine as well."

Nanoha snapped her gaze up to meet burgundy pools staring at her in concern, then back at her knuckles white from crushing the pen in her hand. She forced her fingers loose, and another smile on her face.

"It's alright, Fate-chan. I'm more or less done."

She handed the napkin back to Fate whose gaze lingered that slight bit longer on the brunette before turning back to the proffered item.

_Don't look at me like that, Fate-chan…_

"Takamachi-san…"

_I wish you would just call my name…_

"What is… A 'leek'?"

The brunette blinked, breaking out of her depressive internal spiral. "Do you not know what a leek is, Fate-chan?"

The blonde blushed even harder, fidgeting in her seat. "I don't think I'm very apt at this entire cooking thing…"

Nanoha chuckled. Fate was just so… Hopeless. "Looks like we're going to the supermarket."

* * *

The trolley rattled noisily as Fate pushed it down the seemingly never-ending aisle stocked with all sorts of outlandish foods from every corner of the galaxy. Half of these things didn't even seem very edible. The blonde bit back a yelp as what could only be described as a toothy vegetable attempted to gnaw at her hair. She ducked just in time, scampering nervously to the opposite end of the aisle, eyes wide with fear. Yet her shopping partner seemed completely at ease, jogging up and down the row, picking up seemingly random items of food and chucking them into the trolley.

Fate let herself relax slightly. Watching the other girl patter on excitedly about the abstract differences between brands of sugar was strangely comforting. Something about being with this girl, doing something as simple as grocery shopping, made her feel like part of a family. She had long ceased questioning these inexplicable emotions this one Takamachi Nanoha stirred in her. The brunette was close, probably closer than she noticed she was. Close enough for Fate to breathe in the faint smell of roses and fresh laundry. Close enough for her to trace her eyes on that unblemished skin without worry of being noticed. She let herself lean in that slight bit more, peering at the label of some box Nanoha had in her hand.

The brunette froze, her voice dying in her throat as warm breath ghosted across her shoulder, the familiar scent of lilies enveloping her. She felt the warmth of Fate press against her back, willing her to turn around. Fate was close. Very close. Too close. Close enough for her to see the nervousness etched in her expression. Close enough for her to see the slight hint of tears at the edges of her eyes.

Nanoha reached up and brushed the beginnings of a tear from those crimson eyes, feeling the heat of Fate's blush against her skin.

"Fate-chan. I love-"

Nanoha caught herself before the words slipped out from her lips, her eyes widening as she quickly scrambled to put some distance between them. Fate gave her a quizzical look before nervously laughing it off. Awkward. Like it always was between them.

The tension continued as they paid for their purchases and Fate drove Nanoha home. Where there was comfortable silence before, only the searing edge of Nanoha's unsaid words remained. Was she about to say what Fate thought she was going to say? She barely knew this person, and yet… Yet she found herself longing to hear the brunette finish her sentence.

"Thank you for coming out with me today," Fate said as casually as she could manage.

Nanoha gave her a weak smile, opening the door to step out. "It's no problem at all."

"Call me sometime, Takamachi-san." Fate smiled as the door slid close again.

The car sped away from the sidewalk and Nanoha could only manage a small wave until the car disappeared around the corner before her legs gave way below her and she crumpled to the ground, tears running down her face, holding back those three words she knew she would never hear from Fate again.

* * *

_3 years ago, November…_

"Urgh!" Fate spluttered. "Nanoha! Did you put ginger I this?"

Nanoha furrowed her brow at her wife, putting her hands on her hips. "It's good for you Fate-chan!"

Fate looked testily at the brunette. "I thought you loved me..."

"I do. And that's why I have to do this. Cause no one else will."

"And no hiding them under your mat!"

Fate grumbled something under her breath, begrudgingly setting the corner of the table mat back down and spooning another mouthful of the otherwise delicious stew. Ginger. Her single greatest enemy. Nanoha. Her single greatest weakness. Together, they made a formidable combination that promised to wreck havoc on her dinner. But all that being said, she was glad to finally be home, having some well missed home cooking. Despite her requests to be sent out on fewer missions, her schedule remained punishing, and this was the first time she was back in their home in weeks.

A bit of ginger was but small sacrifice.

By the time Fate was done with dinner and a shower, her wife was already curled up on her side of the bed, the thin sheets barely covering her nightgown clad form. The blonde dutifully turned the lights out in the room, making her way towards the large bed they shared before slipping under the sheets as well. It had been weeks since she had slept in a proper bed, let alone one with her wife in it, and with three weeks of leave, she was going to make the most of it.

Nanoha felt the bed dip slightly behind her and she curled up even closer around the sheets she had bunched up in her arms, making minuscule shuffles away from the blonde who was now pulling herself up alongside the brunette, pressing her body flush against her wife's. The flight instructor could feel the steady heartbeat of her lover against her back, the scent of lilies mixed with shampoo, the silken touch of her hair.

It was almost criminal.

"VIvio's in bed now…" Fate purred sensually in Nanoha's ear, sending shivers down her spine.

"Fate-chan…" the brunette started, turning around in her's wife's embrace and placing her palms on Fate's shoulders before gently pushing her away. "Not tonight…"

Fate paused for a moment, a hint of confusion and disappointment flashing through her burgundy eyes before being replaced by the usual warm, unconditional understanding.

"That's alright." smiled the blonde, pulling back towards her side of the bed and drawing the covers up around them. "Good night, Nanoha. I love you."

Nanoha gave her a strained smile in the dark. "I know."

* * *

"I think Nanoha hates me."

The general looked up from the stack of paperwork on her desk at the distressed blonde seated across from her. She didn't know when her office had turned into some counselling office, but she swore she had to begin charging people for these free consultations at some point. She set the pen back down on the table, pushing herself back into her seat. "Trouble in paradise? It's only been 8 months."

Fate sighed, crossing her legs as she shifted in her seat. Being in the middle of the TSAB headquarters was not exactly how she envisioned spending her 3 weeks of leave, but right now, being here was a much needed reprieve from the baffling tension back home.

"She doesn't seem to want to be around me. And she's a lot more moody these days."

"Did you try to cook for her or something again..."

"What? No. Did Nanoha say something about my cooking?"

"She didn't have to. It's notorious."

"Urgh…" the enforcer groaned, burying her face into her hands. She was beginning to doubt that coming to the general for advice was a good idea. "Be serious, Hayate."

The brunette frowned. "Why don't you just ask her about it?"

"I can't do that."

"Why not?"

"I'm terrified."

"Of what?"

"What if… She doesn't love me anymore?" The words sounded more painful now they were outside of her head.

Hayate guffawed in mock laughter. "You? The Commander Fate T. Harlaown? Sole subject of one of the most active fan clubs in mid-childa?"

"There's a fan club?!"

The general nodded, stroking an imaginary beard. "Of course. There's even one for Nanoha. And one for the both of you together."

Fate face faulted. "This is… Completely irrelevant."

"Perhaps. So coming back to our topic at hand, why do you think she doesn't love you?"

The blonde turned her gaze out the window. This was the first time she discussed any of this with someone else, and actually talking about it felt like she was giving flesh to these treacherous thoughts in her head. But these were not thoughts she could bear alone anymore.

"She hasn't told me she loves me in months now."

"Is that it? Well sometimes people just take these things for gra-"

"We haven't had sex in 3 months."

"WOAH. WAY TOO MUCH INFORMATION." Hayate clamped her hands on her ears, shaking her head violently to rid herself of any vivid imagery.

"Sorry…"

The general sighed, removing her hands from the sides of her head. "Gah… That's fine. Look. We can sit and speculate all we want here, but I think the only way you're going to get an answer, and a solution, is by talking to Nanoha. The two of you are meant to be together. I've never seen a bond stronger than the one you two share. So… Don't be such a wuss and just talk to your wife."

Fate frowned. "Okay…"

"Good. And for future reference, I really don't want to hear about my two best friends' sex lives."

"Noted." the blonde said, rising from the chair. She paused momentarily at the door, turning back to her friend. "Thank you, Hayate."

"Don't mention it." came the reply.

"Remind me to cook you a meal or something."

"Thanks but seriously, no."

* * *

_Present day..._

There was really two ways one could look at this.

One, Fate was really bad at cooking. Catastrophically bad.

Two, she was a miracle worker who defied logic by setting fire to plain water.

Either ways, this whole cooking thing was not going very smoothly.

Fate slumped to the ground, leaning heavily against the kitchen counter, breathlessly clutching the fire extinguisher to her chest.

"Sir, would you like me to cancel the smoke alarm?"

She sighed heavily. "Yes please, Bardiche." The insanely annoying beeping sound finally came to an abrupt stop, throwing the house back into relative silence. Fate was almost certain there had to be better uses for a magical device than turning the smoke alarm off three times in an hour, but for now, she was grateful the fire brigade or the police was not threatening to break down the front door yet. She glanced at the assortment of still uncooked (and some slightly burnt) ingredients on the kitchen counter across from her and let out another despondent sigh.

Maybe she should just order in.

The blonde set the heavy red canister down on the ground, letting it roll across the wooden flooring until it came to a bumpy stop below the sink. After another 4 seconds of procrastination, Fate dragged herself back to her feet. It was going to take some time to get those scorch marks off the walls. She hunted around the kitchen for a sponge and some cleaning agents, flipping open several drawers before coming to the one the fire extinguisher had come to rest against. The drawer was crammed full of random papers, mostly bills, but absolutely bereft of any cleaning implements. Fate was about to kick it shut again when she noticed a worn looking notebook sitting amongst the small collection of paper.

She knelt down, gingerly picking up the notebook. It was pretty plain, aside from the occasional stain and other obvious signs of frequent use. She thumbed the pages slowly, barely registering the enormous amount of writing on them. It was definitely Hayate's handwriting, the neat scrawl easily matching the note she had left for Fate several mornings ago.

"A recipe book?" Fate wondered aloud, stopping midway through the notebook to read an entry slightly marred by sauce.

_"Yakisoba from the new year festival…" _

Fate chuckled at the single line. This was one strange recipe book. For starters, it barely had any instructions in it. If anything, it looked more like a shopping list. She turned the page, slowly scanning the other entries.

_"Green tea with one sugar…"_

_"She hates ginger."_

_"She always takes 3 sugars in her coffee. No milk…"_

_"When she has a stomach ache, she likes a warm glass of caramel milk…"_

_"She likes the smell of lilies…"_

Burgundy eyes widened.

"What... Is this...?"

* * *

Nanoha flopped backwards onto her bed, hand fumbling until it found the pillow at the head of the bed. Once her fingers gripped the soft cushion, she pulled it forcefully towards her, smacking it against her face, muffling her groan of utter embarrassment. She almost ruined everything. Everything being whatever scrap of relationship she had left with Fate. Just a little bit more loss of self-restraint and she would have...

_Why did Fate-chan have to look so damn irresistible?_

The flight instructor let out another frustrated grumble into the pillow. She could still hear the awkward laugh, still see that look of uncertainty and nervousness in those eyes. All while Nanoha was staring at her with unmasked passion. She wouldn't be surprised if Fate wanted to completely distance herself from her now.

_She did ask me to call her…_

Cobalt eyes wandered to the clock on the bedside table.

11pm

Was it already this late? Time seemed to simply fly past whenever you're in a self-deprecating mode.

She flipped open her phone and hit the speed dial she had never bothered to change.

Old habits die hard.

* * *

Fate clutched the notebook tightly in her hand, sitting at the edge of the dining table chair. She was not entirely sure what to make of this new discovery, though she had a pretty strong suspicion the entire notebook was about her. Or whoever she used to be.

There was just so much she didn't know. And whenever she stopped to take a breather, the weight of all the unanswered questions was crushing. Maybe she should ask Hayate about it...

She sighed, resting her head in her hands propped up on the table. It was late, and her host had yet to return. Her stomach rumbled its dissatisfaction as she glanced at the clock. Something must have held her up at work.

Speaking of work...

"Bardiche… What was I working on before… You know…"

_"Authorization required from Schwertkreuz. Request?"_

Fate sighed. "No, that's fine."

She wasn't expecting any concrete answers, considering how tight the security was at TSAB. Whatever it was, she hoped it was worth all of this. She lazily prodded the triangular magical device on the table. This limiter was annoying.

"Bardiche, what was my last deployment location?"

_"Authorization required from Schwertkreuz."_

"Bardiche, what was my rank and designation?"

_"Authorization required from Schwertkreuz."_

"Bardiche, who was I last working with?"

_"Authorization required from Schwertkreuz."_

Fate resisted the urge to chuck the glowing device halfway across the room and instead directed a frustrated frown at it.

"Bardiche, what was my relationship with Commander Takamachi?"

_"Last record: Platonic."_

Unhelpful.

"Bardiche, what was my relationship with General Yagami?"

_"Last record: Romantic."_

_Eh?_


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Thank you all once again for the reviews! You guys really make my day after an exhausting day of training.

A short chapter for all of you. Promise the next few will be more substantial. But making this chapter longer than it currently is felt a bit off kilter.

I'm trying not to change to rating as much as I can, but once I begin fearing for the life of my fic, I will change it over to M. But please be warned, there is a bit of nearly M-rated bits in here.

Sorry NanoFate fans, this chapter has nearly no Nanoha in it. =\

Thank you to the kind reviewer who clarified the military rankings. Unfortunately, it's a bit too late for me to change anything right now, but I will keep that in mind for my next fic.

Some readers may find repeating themes in the story. Many things that happen in the flashbacks are mirrored in situations they get into now. They'll all start coming together from this chapter onwards.

* * *

**07:**

_1 year ago, December…_

"Are you awake already, Hayate?"

The young general turned around, straightening her tie before smoothing out the last creases in her skirt. She smiled faintly at the girl still currently lost somewhere amidst the sea of sheets emitting grumpy noises. She was never much of a morning person, and was usually completely incoherent before 10am and an entire pot of over sweetened coffee.

"I have a meeting this morning with some admirals." the brunette said, slipping on her dark blue coat. "You can stay here longer if you'd like. There's coffee on the kitchen counter."

"Thanks Hayate," Fate mumbled into the sheets, her eyes sliding shut again as she tugged the blanket over her head. "One day, you're going to make some lucky asshole really happy."

Her smile never left her face as she picked up the briefcase and quietly left the room. It was one she practiced well. No frowns, no tears, no demands of anything more. Just a smile in the morning and a simple goodbye.

It was always like this. Whenever Nanoha was in Cranagan, it was almost as if Fate was avoiding her, refusing to return to her apartment, insisting that Bardiche redirect all her calls. She would hide out for weeks at a time at the Yagami residence. Not that it was a very subtle hiding place to begin with.

The first time, they were both completely drunk, Hayate having introduced Fate to wine for the first time. They woke up, swearing it was a mistake, promising they would never do it again. Yet it did. Over and over again. Without the alcohol. Hayate had no illusions about what it truly was; the sad look in her friend's eyes. The sadness she could never erase. Fate never put a label on what they had. And Hayate never asked. It was the general's way of protecting herself, even if her heart shattered every time the blonde left in the morning.

But knowing all this.

Even without her permission.

She had fallen in love with her.

"Hayate."

"Good morning, Vita." Hayate replied cheerfully, not looking up from the newspaper on the table. The Wolkenritter sat herself at the dining table, sipping her excessively strong cup of coffee. Dark blue eyes regarded the general. She never liked this smile. The one that never reached her eyes. And she knew the cause of it.

"Is _she_ here again?"

Hayate ignored the cold edge to Vita's question, folding the papers back into a neat pile and setting it down. "Have you had breakfast?"

"You shouldn't let her do this to you."

"Did you need a lift to work?"

Vita frowned as her mistress rose from her seat. "You know I'm doing this for you."

"I know I know… You're my knight after all." smiled Hayate, genuinely this time. She patted the redhead fondly, ruffling her hair, much to the smaller girl's annoyance. "I trust you'll always protect me."

An indignant blush dusted the Wolkenritter's cheeks as her eyes followed Hayate out the door. The loud roar of an engine started up and faded into the distance. Vita let her head sink down onto the cool surface of the table. Protect her? Regardless of how skilled she was at combating physical enemies, how was she meant to protect Hayate against something as intangible as heartbreak? The pain was evident in those unsmiling eyes, regardless of how much she tried to hide it. And there was simply nothing Vita could do.

Aside from obliterating the source of her pain.

Something Hayate had expressly forbid her from doing.

She exhaled a frustrated groan into the table. Some knight she was.

Maybe she should just tell Nanoha to take her huge blonde mess home.

It was impossible that Nanoha wouldn't know. The entire fleet knew about the unofficial-yet-official relationship between General Yagami Hayate and Commander Fate T. Harlaown. Entire betting pools had sprung up speculating when they were going to come out in the open about their… Whatever it was they had. But the knight had her reservations about whether that would ever happen.

After all, it had been a whole year now. Fate had never taken off the ring.

* * *

_Present day…._

"Fate," Hayate called into the darkened house as she kicked off her heels by the door. "Are you home?"

The house was quiet, save from the occasional clack from the shishi odoshi in the back. Frowning slightly at the lack of a response, she made her way to the kitchen, chucking her briefcase on the counter with a tired sigh. The meetings had run far later than she had hoped and she was starving.

"Lights on."

The kitchen came alive with light illuminating the slightly blackened walls above the stove.

"What the universe of Tosaka Rin happened here?!"

The general ran her hand over the darkened splotches before her expression softened into a knowing smile. Though, it was going to take a fair bit of elbow grease to get these marks off...

"Hayate."

The brunette turned around to see Fate leaning against the door, an unreadable expression on her face.

"Hey, you're still up? I would have thought you would have gone to bed by no-"

The blonde tossed a worn notebook onto the table, cutting the general off mid sentence.

"Explain this."

Blue eyes widened. Her heart stopped for a second as she stared at the book she had long forgotten about.

"Fate, where did you get that-"

"Why do you address me so directly?"

"What?"

"Why do I have the key to your house? Why are all my clothes in your bedroom?" demanded Fate, fury surging in her crimson eyes as she grabbed Hayate by her collar, slamming her roughly against the counter. The blonde was undoubtedly far stronger than the smaller girl, and all Hayate could do was hang on to the front of Fate's black shirt, crinkling the fabric in her grip.

"Fate, just calm dow-"

Hayate's words were cut off by a pair of soft but firm lips. She had tasted this once, twice, or maybe more times before. The bittersweet tang of desperation mixed with the salt of tears. Searching for something she could not possibly give.

"Why are your lips so damn familiar…" she whispered raggedly next to the brunette's ear, the agony loud and clear, silencing any further protests from Hayate.

"Who are you to me, Hayate?"

It was heartbreaking.

"Fate…"

"Why didn't you say anything to me…"

"It would have been unfair to you."

Anger swelled in Fate's chest. "Unfair to me? What about you? And you let me go on and on about Nanoha-"

"The two of you belong together. Everyone can see that." Hayate said, before adding quietly. "Even I can see that."

"You can't make these decisions by yourself... You should have told me…" As soon as the words left her lips, she felt an inexplicable sharp pang of irony, her tight hold on Hayate's collar loosening slightly.

"Fate." the brunette's voice said steadily, silencing the taller girl. "If you wanted to be with me, I want it to be because you fell in love with me. Not because of what we used to have. I wanted you to love me for who I am. Not for who you were."

"Hayate…"

"Sir, incoming call from Raising Heart."

Hayate's hands dropped from their grip on the blonde's shirt, folding across her chest as she turned away from the confusion and sadness in those burgundy eyes.

"It's okay. Go to her."

It was only after the main door shut that Hayate let her legs give out from under her, sinking slowly to the ground as she finally let herself cry, the painful sobs wracking her body as her fingers lingered on her bruised lips.

* * *

_1 year ago, June..._

"Hayate."

"Yes Fate-chan?" responded the general, not looking up from the papers she was signing. She was already getting used to the blonde enforcer appearing in her doorway every day, mostly to whine. Sometimes to cry. Though, mostly it was whining. Hayate had learned to sit and listen, occasionally pushing forward a well timed box of tissues. Though after 3 months of this, it was beginning to wear away at her commitment to staying empathetic all the time and she had resigned to simply ignoring most of it while Fate sat in front of her, staring forlornly into the distance.

"Send me on a mission."

That got her attention.

"You too? First Nanoha, then you. There just isn't enough deep space for everyone and their issues!" exclaimed Hayate frustratedly, throwing her hands up in the air.

Fate gave her a confused look. "Nanoha requested a mission…?"

"Yeah." the general sighed, rubbing her temples. These aces were going to give her a killer migraine. "And I don't have anything else on the books for a few months since the Wolfram is scheduled for a long voyage."

"Then let me go with you."

Hayate threw Fate a skeptical look. "It's just a simple observation tour, and it'll probably take at least 3 months. Nothing exciting really. Plus, you haven't been on a long mission since you and Nanoha-" the brunette let her voice trail off.

Burgundy eyes stared evenly at tentative blue. "I know. That's why I have to go now."

The brunette returned her gaze evenly. She was not entirely sure where accepting a new deep space mission fit on her 'Fate rehabilitation schedule' but she had an inkling this had something to do with a certain flight instructor rumoured to currently be in town and off duty. "Are you sure this is what you want, Fate-chan?"

"Yes."

"Argh, fine." Hayate relented, turning back to her stack of paperwork. Perhaps a little time away from Mid would do Fate some good. "Meet at the docking area at 0400 hours. And don't be late. The Wolfram waits for no one."

* * *

To say the Wolfram was a sizeable ship was a bit of an understatement. The massive vessel dwarfed many others in the armada, and being staffed by some of the most gorgeous women of the TSAB forces, it earned the rather unique moniker of "Hayate's Lesbian Warship". A name she had never saw the need to correct. But nevertheless, the Wolfram was well suited for this long trip into deep space, though it was hardly a mission really.

Hayate stretched out in her cabin. One of the perks of commanding her own ship was having a massive office to herself, and meals that weren't all freeze dried.

There was a soft knock on the door.

"Come in."

The solid wooden door cracked open to reveal a tuft of golden hair. "Sorry to intrude, Hayate."

"Ah, Fate-chan." the brunette smiled. "I trust you've settled in already?"

"Yes I have." Fate smiled appreciatively, shutting the door behind her as she wandered into the office. "You really didn't have to give me a cabin to myself. I would have been happy bunking with the rest of the crew."

"Pffft. You're an officer, Fate. And my guest. Not to mention the entire crew would have gone into a riot fighting over the bunk next to the famous Commander Harlaown."

The blonde arched an eyebrow. "Riot?"

"They don't call this the Lesbian Warship for nothing."

The enforcer's expression fell into a blank stare. "That sounds completely immoral."

"All part of the charm. Speaking of which…"

Hayate hefted a large bottle onto the desk with a solid thud.

"What's that?"

"Wine. From earth." began the brunette, fishing out a couple of glasses from her desk drawer. She opened the bottle and poured a sizeable amount of the fragrant crimson liquid into each glass. "I would totally tell you about how expensive and rare it is, but I really can't tell one from the other. And I just got this from the grocery store near my place."

The enforcer frowned, taking a glass from Hayate. "I know it's wine. I was referring to the occasion."

"It's my birthday."

Fate's face immediately drained. "Oh… I'm so sorry Hayate! I completely forgot!"

Hayate grinned, waving dismissively as she leaned back into her overstuffed leather chair, propping her feet up on the table. "Meh. That's fine, Fate-chan. I'll only get properly hurt if you forgot my name or something."

Fate smiled. Her first smile in a while now.

"That definitely won't be happening any time soon."

It took them the whole of 3 hours to finish the entire bottle of wine. And for Hayate to decide that Fate was a terrible drunk. The blonde had gone from crying incessantly, to getting incredulously angry, to filling herself with blame, all within the span of the first 20 minutes. Then she would demand another glass in her nearly unintelligible slurred speech, and the entire cycle would repeat itself.

"If I had just insisted she stay with me, wouldn't that have been fine as well?" Fate sobbed into her 8th glass for the evening. She wiped her nose sloppily on the sleeve of her white enforcer's shirt. "If I had been selfish, we could still be together."

Hayate winced, retracting the tissue she was holding up in front of the blonde's face, mostly thankful she wasn't going to be the one who would have to wash that sleeve later on. Over the course of the last few hours, they had managed to make their way to the floor, a point Fate had taken full advantage of and was now lying face down into the plush carpet, occasionally kicking her feet in a full blown drunken tantrum. "But Fate-chan is not selfish. We all know you love her very much and that's why you made the decision you did."

"Everyone I love leaves me. Am I not good enough?" whined the enforcer, grabbing another handful of standard military issue biscuits and shoving it into her mouth, an endeavour one would not attempt sober.

"You're perfect, Fate-chan." Hayate said quietly. Why was she even saying this? Perhaps the alcohol was finally starting to get to her. Yes. She was most definitely drunk. There was no other way she would find one of her oldest friends attractive. Even if said friend was currently sprawled across the floor, her uniform unbuttoned to midway down her abdomen, skirt riding up to somewhere she would not dare to imagine. She blinked back to attention to find Fate inches from her face, a look of sheer concentration directed at her left cheek.

"You've got something there…"

Fate leaned forward to wipe the tiny bit of the coarse biscuit from Hayate's cheek, her finger drawing a slow arc on the soft heated skin.

Hayate's heart thundered heavily in her chest. This was almost too close.

Fate stared intently at her friend, her expression muddled by the copious amounts of alcohol. Then without warning, she leaned forward, pushing her lips against Hayate's. Blue eyes widened impossibly as she felt the rough warmth against her lips. She could feel the desperation and sadness in those heated, messy kisses, taste the salty tears that ran down Fate's cheeks and onto her own, smell the heady mix of alcohol and lilies that was only serving to drag her deeper under. Her elbows sagged under Fate's weight, pressing her down towards carpet.

_Maybe… Just a little… If it will stop the pain, even just for a moment.._

Blue eyes slowly fluttered close, gradually beginning to return the kisses as her hand shakily snaked around the blonde's neck.

Then all of a sudden, Fate's arms were around her. The blonde lifted the general up easily, staggering backwards into Hayate's adjoining cabin, kicking the door shut behind her. Hayate felt the cooled sheets of the bed contact with her back and clumsy hands yanking roughly at the buttons of her white shirt, pulling at her tie. Urgent lips pressed against her neck, making careless marks against the soft skin she was most definitely going to regret tomorrow.

Her thoughts whipped past in a blur of colour. She didn't know if she wanted Fate to stop or continue what she was doing with those devilish hands now roaming somewhere under her shirt. Her hands pushed half-heartedly against the blonde, unsure whether she wanted to shove the taller girl away.

"Fate-chan…" Hayate's voice left her in a hoarse whisper.

"Fate." said Fate breathlessly against the soft skin. She looked up at the brunette, locking gaze with the general. "Call me Fate. Nanoha calls me Fate-chan and I…"

Hayate paused, staring back at those desperate burgundy eyes. That sadness. It didn't belong there. She cupped the blonde's face in her hands, kissing her gently. "Okay… Fate."

Satisfied, Fate kissed back, harder, more ardently, each kiss becoming hungrier. The unfamiliar scent of violets flooded her senses, burning itself into her memory as her hands moved on their own accord, feeling, seeking, finding, caressing. She felt fingers dig into her back, the soft sounds Hayate made, the sharp intake of breath whenever she passed an exceptionally sensitive spot, urging her to continue her ministrations. And she wordlessly complied.

The brunette gasped for breath, the sensations overwhelming her completely. She could barely register what Fate was doing anymore, leaving just the feeling of intense… Something. Her hand reached between them and found Fate's center, pressing hard against it and earning herself a sensual moan. The blonde's name left her lips over and over again as their bodies moved together faster and harder, their voices reverberating unchecked against the solid walls of the cabin. Everything was fiery hot and she felt like she was going to melt under those lips as they pushed her closer and closer to the edge.

Her hand clawed mercilessly on Fate's back, scratching bright red lines across the pale skin as her world exploded in a blaze of white hot, the blonde's sharp cry next to her ear sending her right over the edge.

Hayate struggled to catch her breath as she slowly descended from her climax, feeling the thundering in her chest mirroring that in Fate's currently pressed against hers. She was faintly aware of the blonde slowly pushing herself off, rolling over to the side, making her suddenly terribly conscious of how her sweat slicked skin felt so cold against the cooled air of her cabin. The brunette cracked her eyes open, turning slightly to see Fate now sitting upright at the other side of the bed, pulling her clothes back into position. Hayate sat herself up slowly, gathering her now ruined shirt around herself with a tight fist, looking at the back of the taller girl now standing at the far end of the bed.

"Fate…"

"Hayate…" came the quiet voice. The blonde picked up her white officer's coat that was strewn somewhere on the ground. "I'm sorry."

And with that, she was gone, shutting the door behind her with a resolute click.


	8. Chapter 8

A/N:

Woohoo! We're nearing the end of the story! Last couple of chapters here. Thanks to everyone for sticking with me through it all. Despite all the angst. And heartbreak.

As a sub-note, I contemplated having Signum address Hayate as 'Hayate-sama' but it felt a bit odd since she refers to her as 'Aruji Hayate' (Master Hayate) in the anime. So I stuck with that to be truer to form.

thanks to Zarosguth for pointing out the typo!

* * *

**08:**

"Testarossa… What are you doing?"

Fate glanced up startled from what looked like something out of a yoga instructional video along the corridor to see the pink haired knight staring quizzically at her.

"Um… Well… You see…" the blonde spluttered, scanning her suddenly very empty brain for an excuse to be half hiding in a corner. She didn't know what possessed her to duck behind this pillar and all but splay herself out on the ground when she saw a tuft of brown hair coming around the corner.

"If you're avoiding Master Hayate, she's in her meeting."

"Ah…" Fate began sheepishly, rising awkwardly from her position on the ground with all the grace of a giraffe in syrup. "Thanks."

"Testarossa," Signum said seriously, matching Fate's awkward smile with a hard glare. "I don't know what it is you have intended for Master Hayate. But whatever it is, I hope you remember that I am first and foremost a Wolkenritter."

"Of course I remember-"

The knight leaned forward to whisper in the blonde's ear. "And if you hurt her I will tear you limb from limb."

The enforcer swallowed visibly, feeling beads of nervous perspiration run down her face. Signum and her had gone head to head many times before, but something in the pink haired woman's voice this time promised her a whole new world of hurt.

There was the soft click of heels approaching and Signum smoothly pulled back to a polite distance, turning her attention to the far end of the corridor behind Fate, effortlessly rearranging her death stare into a softer expression.

"Master Hayate."

Fate turned around slowly to see a slightly surprised looking Hayate at the end of the narrow passageway, a small stack of papers in her hand. There was no escape now.

"I am needed in the hangar bay." Signum announced, pivoting on her heel and striding purposefully past Fate in the opposite direction. "Please let me know if I may assist with anything, Hayate-sama."

She shot a final cold stare at Fate. "_Anything at all._"

As the Wolkenritter'a sharp footsteps faded off in the distance, silence pervaded the small aisle. Silence and thick, suffocating tension. Fate's burgundy eyes trained steadily on the brunette, unsure of what to say, if anything at all. What exactly do they teach you to say after you had drunken sex with one of your best friends then ran off to cry in a bathroom? Oh right. They don't. It would be so much easier if she could just turn around and sprint away from Hayate and all her guilt.

"Fate…"

Running was not an option now.

"Hayate..." the blonde started hesitantly. It felt strange hearing Hayate address her so differently. So... Tenderly. Intimately. And all it did was weigh down on her even heavier, echoing in her mind in the same breathless whisper she heard so many times the night before. "How.. Was your meeting?"

"It was alright." the general replied calmly as she slowly closed the distance between them. "War. Money. Politics. The usual."

Hayate unconsciously pulled the collar of her uniform closer around her neck, barely concealing the angry looking hickey that stood out glaringly against her pale skin. Fate turned away, her face now a deep red, the memory of that soft skin under her lips still fresh in her mind. The feeling of those fingers digging into her back. The warmth of that breath beside her ear. It was maddening.

"Hayate… I'll be taking the next shuttle down to a nearby planet and transport myself back to Mid-Childa."

The general frowned. She knew Fate had a predilection for running away, but this time, she was not going to let her, regardless of how much this was going to hurt. "You really don't have to."

"But I do. I really shouldn't have done... that to you."

"Fate, listen to me…"

"I can't, Hayate." Fate said loudly, silencing the brunette. She looked deep into those unreadable blue eyes, unsure of how much longer she could keep herself together before she totally broke down. Her voice softened to little more than a quiet whisper, turning away to stare guiltily at the floor. "I abused your trust. I hurt you."

Suddenly, two palms were on the side of her face, roughly turning her gaze back up to meet the unwavering conviction in bright blue orbs. The general looked Fate squarely, her voice assertive. "I wanted it as much as you did."

The blonde blinked. "You… Did?"

"Fate, I'm the Mistress of The Night Sky. I reckon I would be strong enough to fight you off if I really wanted you to stop." Hayate said, a mock serious expression on her face.

"But I…"

"It's alright Fate. This doesn't have to change anything."

"I just don't want to hurt you."

"I'm not made of porcelain, despite what my Wolkenritter might tell you." the brunette said, hoping her voice would not betray just how vulnerable she was feeling.

Fate shuffled uncomfortably on the spot. It would have been so much easier if Hayate would just get mad at her. Slap her. Throw her into the brig. Anything but this. This forgiveness was a far harsher punishment to bear.

She started when the general suddenly turned around, taking a few steps down the passage before stopping to toss Fate a gentle smile. "Let's just go grab something to eat. And we can talk about it if you want to."

.

* * *

_2 years ago..._

"Nanoha… We need to talk."

Nanoha looked glumly up from the book she was pretending to read to lock gaze with those intense burgundy eyes, feeling her chest constrict. When had it become so awkward around the blonde?

"Talk about what, Fate-chan?"

Fate sat herself down on the couch next to the brunette, the closest they had been in weeks now. She felt Nanoha shift uncomfortably next to her, bringing a sharp pang to her heart. She fought back the wave of uncertain sadness to reach out and grasp the flight instructor's hand in her own, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

"I know things haven't been going... Smoothly for us recently." Fate began, looking earnestly into cobalt eyes as she struggled to find the words. "And I know it's probably my fault too. I said I would be around more but I really haven't been keeping my end of the bargain."

"It's not Fate-chan's fault..."

The white mage handed a rumpled letter to her wife. The folds were well worn into the paper from all the times Nanoha had unfolded and refolded it, hoping the content would change every time she read it. But it stubbornly stayed the same. The first letter from her family in months. Politely informing her of their intention to remove her name from the family register so she may live the life she wants. As a Harlaown. Not a Takamachi. Their offering of a "compromise".

But it was clear what it truly was. A choice. An ultimatum.

"Nanoha…" Fate began, rubbing her hand soothingly on the brunette's back. "It'll be okay. It's just a name. They don't sound that angry-"

Nanoha roughly brushed Fate's hand off her, turning sharply to face her wife.

"WHAT DO YOU KNOW?! YOU'RE NOT EVEN FROM EARTH!" As soon as the sharp words left her lips, Nanoha wished they hadn't, clamping a hand over her mouth as she saw the hurt seep into Fate's eyes.

"Nanoha… What can I do to make this better?"

"I can't…" sobbed Nanoha, the tears now flowing down her cheeks in warm rivers of despair. "I… I don't know what to do, Fate-chan…"

Trembling hands crushed the letter, smearing its harsh words with her anguished tears. She honestly thought she was stronger than this. But after the first Christmas, new years, birthday with no news from her family at all, her resolve was beginning to crumble. This letter was just the final chip in her already shattered mental wall.

All of a sudden, she was surrounded by familiar warm arms as she was drawn into the sweet scent of lilies. She let the blonde pull her close, her face buried in Fate's shoulder. She had missed this closeness.

"Just tell me to leave, and I will, Nanoha."

The brunette screwed her eyes shut. The words hurt more than she thought they would. "Is… Is that what you want, Fate-chan?"

"Of course not." Fate said quietly, edging the pain out of her voice. "But what I want more than anything is to stop your pain, Nanoha. I would do anything for your happiness, even if it means I am no longer the source of it."

The brunette had always been the strong one. Strong enough for the both of them. Strong enough to shield Fate from everything she was going through. But right now, for Nanoha, she would carry her pain, shoulder the world, make the decision they both did not even want to think about.

Nanoha lifted her head to meet those crimson orbs now filled with an unimaginable sadness as she felt the blonde gently push her away. "Fate-chan…?"

"You've made me happier than I have ever been, or ever deserved to be. And that is enough for me."

"Isn't that my decision as well?" the brunette felt her voice rising. "You can't just go deciding these things on your own!"

"I'll always be here for you, Nanoha." Fate whispered, her breath dancing on her wife's lips. She couldn't bear look in those cobalt eyes now overflowing with tears. If she did, all her resolve would simply melt away. "All you have to do is call for me."

She leaned forward, moulding her lips against the white mage's, as she had done countless times before. But this time, her poured all her love into it, burning her memory into those lips, urging Nanoha to never forget her. Urging herself to never forget this feeling.

"I love you."

And then, she was gone.

Two weeks later, Nanoha received the divorce papers in the mail.

* * *

_1 year ago, December…_

"NANOHA!"

Fate woke up, screaming, a thin sheen of sweat on her skin, her hands reaching out and grasping only thin air. Her heart pounded mercilessly against her chest as her breath left her in rapid puffs.

Crimson eyes adjusted slowly to the darkness as she blinked back to consciousness, making out the velvety outlines of furniture. The cool stillness of the night air against her bare skin. This was not the battlefield. And Nanoha was not here.

She felt a warm body against her back, slim arms wrapping themselves around her as a pair of soft lips pressed a soothing kiss behind her ear.

"It's okay, Fate…" murmured Hayate in her ear reassuringly. Her low tone calming the blonde's racing heart. "I'm here… I'm not going anywhere."

The enforcer slowly relaxed, letting herself fall back in the brunette's arms and onto the bed, the familiar 4 words Hayate always said lulling her back into restless slumber. The general gave her sleeping lover a concerned frown as she felt the blonde's breathing even out. It was the 2nd time this week alone. Not to say anything about the last few months.

Stealthily, Hayate slipped out from under Fate, pulling the sheets up around the blonde protectively. The general herself slid out of bed, throwing a yukata over herself as she silently left the room and into the darkened corridor.

The rock garden was her usual sanctuary in this house. Something she had been requiring more often recently than she would have liked. The cold air nipped at her cheeks, prompting her to pull the yukata closer around herself. Fate wasn't the only one not getting a good night's sleep whenever these nightmares came.

"Can't sleep?"

Hayate turned to see Vita plodding out onto the patio, a thin jacket over her slightly oversized red pyjamas. The flight instructor rarely slept in the sprawling house these days with her erratic training schedule. But Hayate was glad for the nights when her small red haired knight was around. It made her feel just that little bit less... Lonely.

"Yeah… Just needed some fresh air." the general said, leaning lightly against one of the wooden pillars as she continued gazing out onto the intricate patterns on the sand.

"How long are you going to keep this up?"

"Keep what up?"

Vita furrowed her brow at her mistress. "Don't play dumb with me, Hayate."

"I'm not…"

"These walls are literally paper thin. I can hear her calling out for Nanoha every other night."

Hayate winced imperceptibly. Hoping no one would overhear was probably wishful thinking. And it wasn't just during the nightmares that Nanoha's name would slip from the enforcer's lips. Sometimes it was almost too much.

"It's just the nightmares…" she said softly, more to herself than Vita.

The small knight stood in stony silence next to Hayate, her hands balling up into tight fists. She hated feeling this useless in the face of Hayate's obvious suffering. To watch the brunette pretend to be strong for someone else when she was clearly breaking. To see her constantly hold back the tears she needed to cry to protect someone who didn't even notice.

She hated it so much.

"Do you love her?"

Hayate was slightly taken aback by Vita's soft question, far gentler than the usual harsh tone she took when talking about Fate.

"She needs me right now."

"That's not what I asked."

"But that's all that matters."

* * *

_2 months ago…_

Crimson eyes lingered on the wedding band on her finger. She had never taken it off. How long had it been now since their first night on the Wolfram? One year? And god only knew how many times she had cried out Nanoha's name during her many subsequent nights spent in Hayate's bed. She knew how much this must have been hurting Hayate, no matter how hard the general tried to hide the pain in her eyes. Yet the brunette stayed steadfast by her side. Never wavering. Always there for her. And Fate had enough of being selfish.

Enough of living in the past.

She slowly slipped the ring off her finger, immediately feeling a rush of sadness and liberation at the same time. She gave the shiny silver band a lingering look, rolling it between her fingers, soaking in the strange empty feeling in her hand. Taking a deep breath, she slipped the ring in her pocket just as the door to the cabin slid open with a mechanical hiss.

"Hello there Fate, fancy seeing you here." Hayate smiled as she stepped in.

The blonde gave her a chuckle. "This is my cabin. I should be the one saying that."

"Well, this is my ship."

"Point taken."

It was an unspoken understanding between them. She would always come to Fate's cabin after a particularly stressful meeting, mostly to hide away from the myriad of people who would be shoving paperwork in her direction at all times of the day. This was already the 3rd voyage undertaken by the Wolfram in the last year and the 3rd time Fate was on board. She always enjoyed these journeys. Away from Cranagan. Away from everything. Plus, being listed as part of the Wolfram's crew excused her from being dispatched on those tiring enforcer missions at some far flung corner of the universe.

"Fate… Have you looked out at the stars recently?"

"No, I haven't."

The blonde glanced up at the general who had chucked her officer's coat and stack of files on the nearby chair. The brunette made her way to the large floor to ceiling window and stared out into the vast blackness of space. The faint glow from far off stars lightly illuminated her, painting the contours of her face with a soft glow.

"They're beautiful, aren't they?" Hayate smiled.

_You're beautiful._

Fate bit back the words and opted to stare quietly for a moment as Hayate began again.

"Don't you ever wish life had a reset button?"

"I guess so." Fate sighed. "There are just so many bad decisions I've made. So many people I have hurt. If I could, I would take it all back."

Hayate hummed in acknowledgement, not taking her eyes away from the view out the window. The enforcer gazed at her lover as the brunette leaned against the window frame.

"How about you Hayate? What would you like to 'reset'?"

"Nothing." came the quick reply.

"Don't you ever regret it?" Fate asked. "All the death. Everything we've lost."

Blue eyes looked at her tenderly. Fate felt a slight blush rise to her cheeks as she felt the intensity of the brunette's gaze.

"How can I possibly regret any decision that led me to you?"

The blonde felt her heart quicken just that tiny bit. She licked her lips nervously.

"Hayate, there's something I've been meaning to talk to you about."

The brunette turned to face the blonde with a small smile. "What is it?"

Fate felt herself falter at warm look Hayate was giving her. The way the brunette would stop everything to give her undivided attention always shook her a little. Made her feel like she was the only person in Hayate's world. She felt a blush slowly rise to her cheeks. But it was now or never.

"I want to talk about us."

Hayate's eyes widened as the blonde stepped towards her, that determined look in her eyes. She knew where this was going and was honestly not sure if she was looking forward to this conversation or not. She shifted slightly from her relaxed position as Fate closed the short distance between them.

"Okay…"

"I want you to know that I am serious about us." Fate started, taking Hayate's hand in hers. "And while it might take me some time to be able to fully give everything to you, I would like to ask you to consider making this offi-"

"General Yagami, urgent transmission."

"Hold that thought, Fate." Hayate smiled, pulling her hand gently from Fate's grasp before turning her attention to the hologram in front of her, slightly relieved for the interruption. She forced the insane racing of her heart to calm down, speaking in a level voice. "Connect."

The sound of shots suddenly exploded over the communication channel as a fuzzy image of a young soldier materialised in front of her. "General! This is Captain Lichreiter of the 17th mobile squad requesting assistance on Uninhabited World #78! We are taking heavy fire and are running low on supplies."

Blue eyes narrowed seriously. "What is your status?"

"Bad, General!" the young soldier reported over the static ridden feed. "They've taken out 35% of our troops, and even with the assistance of Commander Takamachi, we are barely putting a dent in their numbers."

Fate's eyes widened. "Commander… Takamachi…?"

"Nanoha is there?" Hayate asked worriedly, sending a quick glance at Fate. The blonde stood behind her with an unreadable expression on her darkened face.

"Affirmative. We lost contact with her squad shortly after they entered the enemy base."

All this time, Fate remained frozen in her place, the conversation reducing to a muffled rumble in her mind. She had not seen Nanoha in over a year, and now hearing that she was in danger nearly stopped her heart entirely.

"Captain, we will be there as soon as we can." Hayate said, flicking over to another hologram channel to the bridge. "Rein, I need you to scramble all available mages on board, barrier jackets on and ready to jump in 3 minutes. Get the armoury to muster all available cartridges. All crew to battle stations. Medical bay prep to receive all wounded allies. Set course for Uninhabited World #78. We are at red alert."

"Fate." the brunette started seriously, finally turning to the blonde as the sound of sirens erupted throughout the ship. "We're going after Nanoha."

* * *

Hayate hovered above the scene, tome nested in her hand as she cast another bombardment spell on the vast region below her, instantly freezing everything to buy time for the TSAB forces to fall back to safety. She could see why the 17th mobile squad was having difficulties.

"Fate, can you hear me?"

_"Yes, Hayate. I'm to your east assisting with some evacuations."_

Hayate allowed herself a smile of relief. "Good to hear you're alright. This place is swarming with hostiles."

_"Hayate… I never got to finish what I wanted to say…"_

"You can tell me when you get back safe, Fate."

There was an explosion somewhere below, opening up a cavernous hole in the ground. Hayate spun towards the deafening noise, her eyes immediately picking up on the distinctive pink rays of light that flashed from somewhere deep underground.

_Nanoha._

"StarS team, do you copy? What's your status?" Hayate could barely hold back the worry in her voice, desperately willing the communication to get through to Nanoha.

_"Hayate?"_ Nanoha sounded genuinely surprised. Communications had been cut off from the moment they entered this vast hallway, but seemed to be restored following the removal of the roof. Still, hearing the voice of General Yagami Hayate was definitely not one she had expected. _"Yes. But we're pinned down here."_ There were some added gunshots. _"We will need more firepower here. And more cartridges."_

The general breathed a sigh of relief. Nanoha was alright. Hayate's fingers danced across the holographic screen in front of her, assessing their current ammunition stores. The Wolfram simply was not prepared for an all out assault of this scale and their own reserves were already running dry. "Sorry Nanoha, but we're stretched to our limits at this point. We've sent for backup from the main fleet but it'll take them 15 minutes."

_"Lightning team is en route."_

Hayate paused at familiar voice.

_Fate..._

A sharp ache arched through the brunette's chest. But there was no place for jealousy on the battlefield. Hayate opened her mouth to intervene when Nanoha's anxious voice shot through the communication channel.

_"No, don't come here. The area is way too unstable."_

"Nanoha's right, Fate. Do not enter zone H-7 now. We have to wait for a lull in their attack before attempting to punch through their offence."

There was another loud explosion and Hayate returned her gaze to the intense fighting in the chasm below her. The bright pink light was much smaller now, chipped away slowly by the repeated shots she was sustaining. Before Hayate could react, there was a thunderous crack. Then the pink light exploded altogether.

"NANOHA!"

An immense golden light flashed past Hayate and straight into the hole in the ground before the general could stop her.

_Sonic Drive…_

Hayate barely had time to cast a thin barrier on Fate, knowing she had sacrificed all forms of defence to get to Nanoha. She could only hope it was enough.

The next thing she heard was a near inhuman scream before the impossibly bright light erupted from the ground, painting the entire darkened sky in a hue of blood red.

Hayate swooped down to the surface where Nanoha knelt a short distance away from the unmoving body of Fate. Tears ran free from her unseeing eyes as she continued to jerk a now shattered Raising Heart in the direction of the now vaporised enemy, as if now on autopilot, hollow screams coming from her already hoarse throat. A bloodied Teana ran to her, struggling to hold her team captain back as the ace of aces fought feebly to be let go.

"It's okay," she repeated into the auburn haired girl's ear. "It's over now. It's okay."

The general stumbled to a landing next to the bloodied form on the ground, shakily crashing to her knees. There was still a layer of frost on Fate's face where Hayate had cast her shield of ice, now stained red. She cradled Fate's limp body in her arms, holding the fallen enforcer close to her as she sought out the faint heartbeat. The blonde's golden locks were streaked with fresh blood still oozing from the wound at her left temple. Blood seeped into Hayate's barrier jacket, dyeing it a sickening shade of crimson.

"Master Hayate!"

Signum landed several feet from the general, panting slightly from the exertion of battle, sword poised to protect the brunette as her eyes scanned the scene in front of her.

_"Signum."_ Hayate said, her voice uncharacteristically ice cold. _"Kill them all."_

With that, the general held the taller girl close to her, shooting straight back up into the air as her knight charged right back into the fray, transporting themselves directly into the Wolfram's medical bay.

Fate cracked open her eyes briefly as bright white light flooded behind her eyelids to find herself in an unfamiliar place bathed in sterile white light. The metallic smell of blood pervaded her senses as her vision swam, barely able to make out the face in front of her.

"Hayate…" came the weak voice nothing more than a whisper from the incredibly pale lips.

"Fate…" Hayate's voice trembled, holding the blonde's hand tightly as medical staff immediately began attaching a consortium of equipment to the enforcer from every angle. Fate felt her world darken, succumbing to the deep heaviness that was sucking her into the abyss as Hayate's anxious words pierced her dimming consciousness.

"I'm here. I'm not going anywhere."

Then those burgundy eyes fluttered shut.

* * *

"You look like crap."

Hayate glanced up from her lap at Vita. She probably did look like crap. Considering she had barely slept since returning from the surface of the planet they were now orbiting over 15 hours ago. She was back in her TSAB uniform, the sleeves of her untucked white shirt rolled up to her elbows. Her eyes were bloodshot, partly from exhaustion, partly from the sporadic crying she had done. The battle had wound to a bloody close several hours ago with Signum and Rein taking over command of the troops and crushing the enemy in one continuous push, Hayate's last order to her knight fuelling her to the very end.

"I'll take that as a compliment." the general stated flatly, turning her attention back to the floor.

"How much sleep did you get?"

"Enough."

"That's not an answer."

"Well, that's the only answer you're going to be getting."

Vita was about to heave a witty retort at the general when she was interrupted by a tired voice.

"General Yagami."

Hayate's gaze snapped upwards towards the exhausted medical officer who had entered the waiting room.

"How is she, Lieutenant?"

The medic averted her gaze, mentally cursing whoever it was gave her the less than pleasant job of reporting back to a very anxious general. "We… did our best…"

Hayate's heart stopped. "What are you saying…."

"She's alive. But there's not much else we can do aside from keeping her alive."

All of a sudden, the brunette was up on her feet, inches from the terrified medical officer's face, the rage more than obvious in her usually calm blue eyes. "SAVE HER."

"We've reached the limits of our technology, General."

"THAT'S AN ORDER, DAMN YOU!"

"It's just beyond our expertise."

"Hayate..." Vita interjected calmly, placing her hand on her master's wrist. "Stop this."

The general slowly released her grip on the lieutenant's white coat, her heart still pounding like crazy, expression livid. The medical officer stumbled backwards, muttering a string of useless apologies as the general turned away, shoulders still shaking from the effort to remain calm. The room was silent for what seemed like ages before the brunette finally spoke.

Hayate reached up for the golden device around her neck. "Schwertkreuz, call Dr Ishida Sachie of non-administrated world #97."

"But, General!" interrupted the lieutenant. "Contacting unauthorised persons on non-administrated worlds is against protocol-"

"Do I look like I give a fuck about protocol right now?" Hayate snapped furiously, glaring at the medical officer who shrunk back into a corner of the room.

_"Connected."_ intoned Schwertkreuz.

The general turned to the holoscreen that sprung open in front of her, a crystal clear image of a very surprised looking doctor on the other end.

"Hayate-chan?!"

"Sensei, please save her."

* * *

It was 6 hours now since Fate had been transferred to a general medical ward back on Cranagan. And 8 hours since Hayate had exploded in an infuriated rant at the members of the defence council for questioning her decision to bring a civilian doctor from an unadministrated planet onto a TSAB warship. The general sighed tiredly, sinking deeper into the uncomfortable seat next to the unconscious blonde, running a tired hand through her messy brown hair. She would be lucky not to be dismissed entirely from the TSAB force, judging by the less than pleased looks on the council members' faces.

She turned her gaze towards Fate, now barely recognisable with all the bandages and tubes coming out from her.

But she was alive.

And that made it all worth it.

Hayate reached out to grasp the blonde's hand in her own, giving it a small squeeze before rubbing the back of her hand soothingly with her thumb.

_Rest now..._

She quietly rose from the seat, giving Fate one final lingering look as her hand paused on the doorknob. She was just so still. If it weren't for the monitors and mechanical whine of the life support machine, she would have thought the blonde was already dead. Her chest constricted painfully at the thought.

If she really lost Fate…

Shaking the thought from her mind, she opened the door, stepping outside into the brightly lit corridor and stretching lightly. Time to get back to work.

She turned to leave when she noticed a certain ponytailed mage sitting on the bench outside the room. Nanoha looked up startled, her eyes red from crying, hair still in an unruly mess. She was dressed simply in the TSAB training uniform, something Teana had leant her since she refused to go back home. Cobalt eyes widened as she stared at the exhausted looking general standing in the doorway, jacket draped over the arm, crinkled tie loosened.

"I.. Should go." the flight instructor began, fumbling to stand up.

Hayate sighed tiredly. "No. That's alright. I was about to leave anyway."

They stood in uneasy silence, neither daring to meet the other's gaze. It had been too long since they had seen each other, and since then, many things had happened.

"Hayate-chan…" Nanoha said nervously. "We never did get to talk about…"

"About Fate?"

Nanoha winced slightly at how directly Hayate addressed the blonde. God, this was hard. She would have preferred to hear it from either of them, rather than from the gossip grapevine. The memory of her walking in to one of those fabled betting pools still stung fresh in her mind. The leading bet back then for when her best friend and wife would come out about their relationship was June.

_Ex-wife._

Sure, she had gotten her name back. But was it really worth it?

The white mage cleared her throat. "Yeah.."

"If you're asking, we're not in a relationship." the general stated simply.

Technically she wasn't lying. They had not had that conversation yet.

_Yet._

Nanoha glanced up from the spot on the floor in genuine surprise, and admittedly a bit of hope. "You're.. not?"

The general turned away from the other girl, not trusting herself to turn around and look the flight instructor in the eye.

"You've always been the one she wanted, Nanoha." Hayate said quietly as she started to make her way down the corridor away from the taller girl, taking everything in her not to break out into a run before she rounded the corner.


	9. Chapter 8 and a half

A/N:

This is a Nanoha chapter, covering what transpired on her end after Fate left. This was a draft I had written but planned not to complete since I felt the story was getting a bit too draggy without going anywhere. So it's a bit shorter than my usual chapters.

I originally did not intend to release this chapter (hence the 8.5), but since you kind reviewers have requested it, I am happy to present chapter 8.5.

Enjoy!

* * *

**8.5:**

_2 years ago…_

She was gone.

It had taken 2 full weeks, but now, looking at the empty racks in the wardrobe, the single pair of shoes at the doorway, the empty space next to her in bed… Now it truly started to sink in.

Fate was gone.

Nanoha stared blankly at the empty pillow and made up side of the bed, barely feeling the warm rays of sunlight beginning to filter past the curtains and onto her face. It was time to get up. Get on with life.

_If this can be considered living._

The brunette rolled onto her back with a sigh, closing her eyes again. How many times had she done this now? Waking in the morning to greet a wife who was not there.

_Where are you, Fate-chan? Are you sleeping well?_

Nanoha rolled out of bed, dragging herself to the bathroom to prepare for another day of work. Hayate had offered (or rather insisted) that she take some time off, but staying at home, being reminded of exactly how alone she now was, it was all just too much for her. She was partly thankful for Lindy's offer to look after Vivio for the time being. She really was not sure how well she could keep up her facade, feeling her bright smile already falter when she waved goodbye to her crying daughter.

The brunette robotically moved about the kitchen, setting down the two cups of coffee before stopping herself. Damn these old habits. She sat down, gazing at the steaming mug of coffee and empty seat across from her. Fate's seat.

_Are you eating well, Fate-chan?_

She let out another sigh, downing the last bit of her coffee before turning to drink the other portion as well. She made a face as she gulped the over-sweetened liquid. Fate always liked her coffee way too sweet.

Nanoha placed the mugs in the sink, shakily leaning against the counter as she blinked back the inevitable tears. Fate had made the decision, but wasn't this what she wanted as well? She did not stop Fate as she packed her things. Not when she gave her a final hug goodbye. Not when she got into her car. Not when she pulled out of their driveway for the last time.

She didn't stop her.

So why was she feeling like she had lost everything?

Her hands gripped the edge of the countertop as hot tears ran down the side of her face.

This was just too hard.

* * *

"Hayate-chan."

The general gave her friend a stern look, thinly veiling the concern in her eyes.

"Nanoha-chan, I thought I told you to take the week off? Heck, take the entire month off! You're in no condition to be at work!"

The ponytailed girl stared blankly at Hayate, returning the worried look with an equally lifeless one. "I can't stay at home."

The shorter haired girl frowned. Technically the flight instructor was on leave, but despite all of Hayate's best intentions, here she was. In her office. At least she had the good sense not to attempt to train the fresh recruits in her current state. "Well, you can't stay in here. I need to work."

"Send me on a mission or something."

"As your commanding officer, I have to say no. And as your friend, I have to say you're out of your mind to think I would send you out there like this."

Nanoha sighed. She supposed getting Hayate to send her on a possible suicide mission was a long shot. She buried her face in her hands, screwing her eyes tightly shut.

"Nanoha-chan…"

The white mage felt a pair of warm arms encircle her, pulling her into a tight embrace. Stiffened limbs slowly relaxed, letting Hayate rub her back soothingly, saying nonsensical things like "it's going to be alright", and "everything will work out".

But she was glad for these nonsensical words.

Even if she didn't believe them.

She had pretended to be strong for so long, not showing anyone just how broken she had become. But here, in the arms of one of her oldest friends, she let her barriers come down, cracking ever so slightly as she let herself cry.

"Do you know where she is?" Nanoha quietly asked, her voice slightly muted by Hayate's tear soaked shoulder.

"Fate-chan? No... She didn't tell anyone."

The flight instructor pulled away from the hug, wiping her eyes with the back of her sleeve before giving Hayate a pleading look. "I'm just worried about her. She doesn't pick up her phone. She has Bardiche ignore my calls."

Hayate sighed, getting up to return to her computer terminal. "I'll have a look through the database. I'm sure she would have updated her particulars…"

Nanoha gave her a weak smile. "Thank you, Hayate-chan."

"There's no need to thank me." Hayate smiled back. "She's my friend too."

* * *

_1 year ago..._

It was one of those days again.

Sweltering hot. In a way that made even the hallways in the building seem like saunas. Much to her recruits' relief, Nanoha had called off training for the afternoon in view of the ridiculous weather. The flight instructor herself was wandering the unfamiliar hallways of the TSAB archives, cobalt eyes scanning the names of every door she passed.

"702… 703…" Nanoha read out loud as she walked, getting increasingly frustrated as the corridor went on and on. If she didn't find this fabled room 845 soon, she would have simply no choice but to shoot the head instructor who suggested going to the much cooler archives building for their weekly meeting.

There was a sudden noise next to Nanoha, bringing her to a stop. She glanced briefly at the plain wooden door that seemed to have lost its number plate, cocking her head slightly at the muffled furore that was going on behind it. They sure were rowdy today.

She quickly opened the door, stepping into the dimly lit room. "Sorry I'm la-"

Nanoha stopped mid-sentence as her eyes took in the scene in front of her. Whiteboards with massive charts and tables on them. Stacks of paper on haphazardly arranged desks. And a soldier wearing a bright orange beret that was definitely not part of the prescribed uniform.

This was not the weekly instructor's meeting.

"You're definitely not too late!" beamed the soldier with the orange beret, ushering Nanoha into the room with a dramatic wave. "The betting pool is still open to all! My money is on June."

The brunette raised a distrustful brow. "What betting pool?"

"Only the hottest one right now, of course!" he declared passionately, gesturing at the board behind him that seemed to be filled with dates and figures. "When Commander Harlaown and General Yagami will come out in the open about their relationship!"

Nanoha's heart stopped.

"Commander Harlaown?" she repeated.

"Yep."

"And General… Yagami?"

"That's what I said." Orange Beret said, sagely stroking his imaginary beard. "Though if you ask me, they aren't trying very hard to be discrete in the first place."

At that very moment, the door burst open again and a rather breathless Vita ran in, a slightly crazed look in her eyes.

"Nanoha! There you are! The meeting is about to start!"

Orange Beret turned a very strange shade of green. "Nano…ha? Takamachi Nanoha?!" he yelped in a strangled voice.

Vita frowned. "Is there another Nanoha?"

She turned to the brunette only to find the white mage already gone.

* * *

Nanoha barely registered the drive home, only realising where she was when her body hit the bed. She flopped onto her stomach, burying her face in the sheets, not bothering to change out of her uniform. Her hands grabbed fistfuls of the white sheets, gripping them so hard her knuckles flushed white.

_Hayate and Fate… How long has this been going on?_

Anger. That's probably the first thing she felt. Betrayal. Heartbreak. They all came rushing into her all at once, threatening to tear her apart. Hayate had never said anything about this, keeping mum about all things regarding Fate. When was she going to talk about this? And to think the general was the first person Nanoha had turned to. The brunette felt her heart thud heavily in her chest, beating out the sound of her growing rage.

Nanoha reached for her phone, fingers prepared to jab out the numbers to call Hayate. To demand answers. To demand that she return Fate to her.

But Fate was not hers to lay claim to anymore.

She let the phone slip from her fingers, as she felt a numbness take over her body. Her hand sought out the unused pillow above her, holding it close to her as she felt her heart shatter.

_Fate-chan... Are you happy?_

Whatever hope she had left of the blonde returning instantly vanished, leaving just emptiness. Hollow, desolate, heart-wrenching emptiness.

She held on to the pillow tightly, breathing in the slight remnants of Fate's distinctive scent of lilies. The soft fabric soaked up her tears, stifling the words she knew were too late to say.

"I love you."


	10. Chapter 9

A/N:

This is the end! Well sort of. I had originally intended for a NanoFate end. But while writing this, I grew terribly attached to the Hayate character I had created. So now there will be 2 endings. It will be up to you, the reader, to pick the one you would like to see. A bit like those old school "choose your adventure" type deals. (Yay for reviewer Tsuchiyasa! You read my mind!).

Unfortunately, as with real life, there is no such thing as a happy ending for everyone. Someone is bound to get hurt. Someone is bound to be left with the bitter taste of regret. I wish there was a way to make everyone happy, but after 9 chapters of thinking and delaying the inevitable end, I simply could not come up with one which did not feel like I just stuck someone with someone else for the sake of completion.

So here it is. A very adult end.

Sorry, no threesomes. =\ I draw the line there.

Maybe I should change the category to angst.

I hope everyone has enjoyed the story, even if it may have been quite a fair bit of heartbreak and angst. It has been a long ride, but here we are at the final chapter to the tale. Along the way, I've left several little "easter eggs" (for lack of a better word). Little details that may not have been so apparent on a first read of the story, especially considering the delay between each chapter. This is hopefully to increase re-readability.

Thank you to all my lovely reviewers. I really couldn't have done it without you guys. Like it? Hate it? Please review!

To reviewer Zarosguth: I'm insanely glad you enjoyed that one line! It was glorious in my head too! And thank you for the heads up regarding the typo. I wouldn't have been able to live with myself. Thank you for all your fantastic reviews so far. They've been an immense help in shaping the story!

To reviewer stephygrock3107: (You have a really long use name!) We're nearly at the end of the fic! Thank you for all your reviews so far, and for your kind statistics. The ending I originally planned was NanoFate. Hope this works out for you!

To reviewer Major Mike Powell III: Thank you for all your lengthy reviews up to this point! It has always been an immense pleasure reading your reaction to the chapter and I always look forward to reading your reviews. =)

To all my other reviewers: You are all fantastic! I wish I could type a shout-out to all of you, but it'll take up half the fic! I am now gathering ideas for a next fic. Please let me know if there is anything else you would like to read!

And now…

The final chapter.

* * *

**09:**

_Present day…_

This was the probably last thing Nanoha had expected when she hit that speed dial. She steadied her breathing enough to pour out the cup of tea, taking it to the living room where a rather shaken looking blonde sat. The flight instructor paused for a moment. It was almost surreal, seeing Fate in her home again. Their home. Curled up in her usual corner of the couch. It was almost as if she had stepped back in time. Back to when things were less complex. Less painful.

But she had not.

And the Fate-chan on her couch right now was little more than a stranger.

A stranger who stood on her doorstep in the rain less than half an hour ago.

"Fate-chan? Is everything alright?" Nanoha asked, placing the warm mug in Fate's hands and seating herself next to the blonde. She got a hesitant nod in response from under the towel she had draped over the soaking wet girl. The brunette frowned, instinctively reaching out to rub the other girl soothingly on the small of her back, like she always did. She felt Fate slowly relax under her gentle massage.

"Would you like me to call Hayate-chan-"

"NO!" Fate burst out before retreating back into the corner of the couch. "I mean… No. Please don't."

Nanoha blinked at the sudden outburst. "Did something happen?"

"I… I just don't know how to face her right now." the blonde mumbled into the towel, her face turning a deep red.

The white mage retracted her hand to place it back on her lap. There was little doubt in her mind that this had something to do with the young general. But it really was not her place to question whatever was going on between them. Or how much Fate-chan remembered about Hayate. She had tried so hard to forget about Fate. Forget about the life they had. And just when she thought she had it all under control again, Fate had to go and come barging back into her life. With no recollection of her whatsoever. And it simply tore at her old wounds. Wounds she was so sure she had sealed shut long ago.

But right now, she wasn't the one hurting the most.

Fate jumped slightly at the sensation of a gentle hand on her head, rubbing the towel into her damp locks. She ventured a glance up to see Nanoha affectionately towelling her dry, a warm look in her eyes. A warm look that made her heart beat just that little bit faster. Fate could not help but feel drawn to that steady gaze.

_Don't look at me like that, Fate-chan._

The blonde relaxed slightly, letting the white mage do as she pleased. Her eyes closed slightly as the effects of a terribly amazing scalp massage began to work their magic.

_If you do, I won't be able to hold myself back._

"Thank you Takamachi-san…" Fate said shyly, giving Nanoha a look of genuine appreciation and a small smile.

_I can't..._

Burgundy eyes widened as a pair of soft lips pressed against her own, the hand in her hair holding her head in place.

It seemed like an eternity before Nanoha moved away, the both of them struggling to catch their breath. The brunette pulled out slowly from under the towel, unable to meet the other girl's intense stare.

"I'm sorry… I don't know what came over me-"

She was cut off as Fate pulled her roughly back into another kiss. One much less gentle. The slightly damp towel slipped off somewhere behind them, forgotten for now as the blonde reached out to feel those lips one more time.

She knew these lips. She knew these hands. She knew this voice.

"Nanoha…"

The name fell so easily from her lips like she had said it a million times before. Her heart knew this girl. Her body knew this girl. And it injected her with a warm rush that filled from her toes to the tips of her hair. Her hands laced themselves around Nanoha's neck, pulling her down against her, saturating her sense with the scent of roses that tickled the recesses of her darkened memories.

She knew her.

In so many ways.

And it made her wonder how she ever managed to survive so long without her.

She felt those slender fingers weave themselves into her hair, pulling her closer as if wanting the two of them to melt into one. And Fate felt like that was a very genuine possibility as her heartbeat accelerated, feeling stronger and more… Complete than ever before. The utter loneliness of her blank slate was filled with an immense feeling of being loved. And loving insanely, wholeheartedly in return. In her sea of unanswered questions, her mind supplied only one answer.

She loved Takamachi Nanoha.

_Some things leave their mark on our hearts in a way we simply cannot forget._

She was not sure when her arm had looped around under Nanoha's knee, but she found herself easily lifting the brunette up bridal style, walking down the corridor of the house before pausing.

"Nanoha… Which one…"

Nanoha chuckled against the blonde's neck, feeling the small pang of sadness at the sharp reminder that this was not Fate-chan. She looked like her. Smelled like her. Tasted like her. Felt like her. But here this stranger was. Lost in the corridor of their home. The smile on her face turned melancholic.

"Last door on your left."

Knowing all this, why was she still letting Fate do this?

Fate trotted down the passageway, nudging the door open with her foot before setting the brunette gently down on the edge of the bed.

"Fate-chan, I think we should stop-"

Nanoha's protests were silenced when those pair of lips found hers again, this time intent on keeping her securely in place. Blue clashed with burgundy. And in that lingering moment, the brunette saw a spark of something in those eyes.

A spark of recognition.

A spark of the old Fate-chan.

And it filled her with a sense of hope. Cruel, cruel hope that she clung to with everything she had. Her hands found their way under the blonde's wet shirt as Fate pushed her backwards onto the sheets. The dams broke and years of pent up regret and love burst forth.

And this time she no longer had the strength to fight it.

* * *

.

* * *

It was warm.

Fate opened her eyes, squinting from the bright sunlight that poured into the room through the large window. This was not the Yagami home. She blinked back the last bit of sleep from her mind, slowly registering the room she was in before the memories of last night flooded back to her.

_Oh god…_

She didn't know what had come over her. It was almost like her body acted on its own accord. And she simply could not muster the willpower to resist. Nanoha herself didn't seem to put up much of a resistance either.

_Nanoha._

The name rolled off her tongue easily. Fate blushed an incredible shade of maroon. What exactly was Takamachi Nanoha to her? Whatever it was, it was not unwelcome. Her heart fluttered precariously at the thought of the brunette, feeling terribly giddy and elated at the same time.

"Gah… I really do sound like a lovesick teenager…" groaned Fate, smacking herself in the face. Speaking of which, she needed to talk to Hayate. However awkward that conversation was going to be. The blonde sighed, shaking her fist in silent anger at "past Fate" who put her in such a difficult situation.

Fate plodded uncertainly into the kitchen where Nanoha was preparing breakfast, her long brown hair let down from its usual pony tail to cascade down her back, ghosting the tops of her thighs. She was clad only in a simple white shirt, leaving little to the imagination.

Though, after last night, there really was no need for imagining.

Fate blushed a deep crimson.

"Good morning, Fate-chan." smiled Nanoha warmly, sending another generous helping of redness to the blonde's cheeks.

"Good morning, Nanoha..."

The blonde slid into the seat closest to her, feeling an odd sense of familiarity as she watched the flight instructor busy herself with a stack of pancakes. Everything about this. This house. This kitchen. This incredibly beautiful woman. Everything seemed so painfully familiar, yet frustratingly foreign. Like the name of an old song you once knew but have long forgotten. And it was driving her crazy.

She was snapped out from her thoughts by a mug of coffee being set down in front of her. Fate turned her gaze towards the brunette now taking the seat across from her. It all felt perfect. But there was still an unanswered question that plagued her.

"Nanoha..." the blonde started quietly. "We weren't_ just_ best friends, were we..."

Nanoha was silent for a moment, staring into her cup of coffee.

"No, we weren't."

Her burgundy eyes fell on a familiar white gold band resting on the chain around Nanoha's neck. The very same one she kept in her pocket.

"Nanoha… This…"

As she reached out to touch the ring, a sharp pain shot through her head. She let out a strangled scream, clutching the sides of her head as she crumpled to the floor. Her head felt like it was splitting in two, a voice that sounded so much like her own echoing painfully in her mind.

_Fly with me..._

_Marry me…_

_All you have to do is call for me..._

_Nanoha..._

_I love you._

"Fate-chan!" cried Nanoha, dropping the mug and running to Fate's side, catching her just before she slumped over the side of the chair and hit the ground. The blonde's head throbbed in excruciating white hot pain and everything around her was reduced to a blurry haze. The sound of Nanoha's frantic voice was reduced to a muted mumble as the world closed in around her.

Then everything went black.

* * *

"Hayate!"

Fate sat up suddenly in bed, reaching blindly in front of her into nothing but air. Another sickening throb wracked her head violently and she flopped backwards back into the bed, clutching her forehead which she discovered to be swathed with bandages.

Burgundy eyes opened slowly to the rhythmic robotic beeping in the background. The sharp smell of antiseptic hit her like a freight train, making her already splitting headache that much worse. Not to mention she had no idea where she was.

There was the soft scrape of the door sliding open somewhere in the room and a medical officer entered, holding a worn out looking clipboard. He glanced up from the thick stack of notes towards Fate, meeting her tired and confused gaze with his own calm one.

"Ah Commander Harlaown, you're awake." came the deep voice.

The blonde frowned deeply at the medic, attempting to focus her blurred gaze on him as her head continued its annoying throb. "Where am I..."

"Saint King Hospital."

"I'm in Cranagan?"

"Yes ma'am. Commander Takamachi brought you in a few hours ago after you passed out."

Fate suddenly sat back up in the bed, the world swimming around her. "Nanoha did?!"

She groaned groggily, grasping the bedrail to steady herself while the medical officer rushed to her assistance, easing her slowly back onto the bed. She was _this_ close to throwing up on him.

"Yes ma'am. You should lie still for now. I'll go let her know you're awake."

Fate waved her hand feebly, shaking her head. "No, get me General Yagami."

"But it's written here to contact Commander-"

She shot him a stern look. "Do I need to repeat myself?"

"No ma'am."

Fate shut her eyes as he left the room in a slightly terrified hurry. Cranagan? When did she get here? The last thing she remembered was diving head first into incoming fire, the icy cold frost on her face, Hayate's tear streaked eyes, the scent of violets.

Then nothing.

Fate felt her head ache impossibly as she tried to recall any events afterwards. How long had she been out for? Was the battle over? Why did Nanoha bring her in to the hospital? She furrowed her brow in frustration as she reached for her phone. She should contact Hayate.

Flipping through her phone, her frown deepened at all the last calls and messages. All to Nanoha. When did they start talking again? She read through the strained, awkward texts one by one, almost convinced this phone belonged to someone else entirely.

She tossed the phone wearily onto the table with an exhausted groan. It was giving her more of a headache than anything else.

"Fate?"

The blonde turned towards the familiar voice in the doorway to see the young general standing hesitantly at the entrance. She looked exhausted, dressed in her usual home attire of her favorite yukata. She must have skipped work today.

"Hayate..." she began. "I made it back safe."

"That depends on your definition of safe." Hayate frowned as she made her way into the room, seating herself on the chair pulled up next to Fate.

"You said you would hear me out when we got back..." Fate smiled in return.

Hayate knew this smile. The tired, pained one that hid many scars. So different from the baggage-free goofy grin she had seen for the past several weeks. Fate was back._ Her_ Fate was back. But things were not the same anymore.

They had their 'reset'.

And she had chosen Nanoha.

She would always choose Nanoha.

Hayate swallowed a lump in her throat, feeling her heart begin to ache. Her happy ending was so close she could almost taste it. But, this story was never hers to star in. This happiness was never hers to have. And she had one final sacrifice to make. "Fate, about that…"

Fate reached out to hold the brunette's hand in her own. This was where they left off. And this time, no freakish emergency on a far-flung planet was going to get in her way. "Hayate, I wanted to ask if you wanted to make this thing between us official."

Hayate was silent, refusing to meet the blonde's patient gaze, instead gently pulling her hand out of the taller girl's tender grasp.

"Do you... Not feel that way about me?" Fate asked quietly. Was this not what Hayate wanted? After an entire year of dancing around the subject, now that the enforcer was ready to leave all her baggage behind and step forward with her, all she got in response was heart breaking silence.

There was a soft rustle of the sheets and Fate looked up to see Hayate closing the distance between them. She felt those soft warm lips against her own. She tasted love, tears, but above all resignation.

The brunette slowly pulled away, unable to hide the tears that were beginning to spill from the corners of her eyes. "I love you, Fate. More than I ever thought possible. More than I should have allowed myself to."

"Then why..."

"I've told you before," Hayate whispered shakily in fate's ear. "Your smile is beautiful. Anything less than that..."

She ran a thumb over Fate's cheek gently wiping away a stray tear the blonde didn't even know she had shed, looking steadily into her eyes.

"… I simply cannot bear."

* * *

.

* * *

A/N:

Okay, so from here, the ending splits into two. Please select the ending you would like on the drop down menu when they become available.


	11. The Nanoha Route

A/N: So here we go! Final chapter. This was the route I had planned at the start. Hope you have all enjoyed Remember Me. Please leave a review!

Happy valentines' day everyone!

* * *

**The Nanoha Route**

The cold night air nipped at her face as the autumn breeze pulled playfully with the long blonde strands. Fate sat on the window sill, the sound of the city below a distant whine.

It had already been 3 months since she was discharged from the hospital, Dr Ishida giving her a clean bill of health and a stern warning to avoid any further head trauma. If she could avoid it anyway. And the further Fate got from that incident, the more it seemed like things were settling back to their usual routine. Except...

She had not seen Hayate or Nanoha since then.

She sighed. How did things get to this state?

Then there were those messages to Nanoha. The ones she could not possibly remember sending. Dr Ishida had filled her in on some scant details about her amnesia, though barely enough to answer all these questions in her head. She flipped through the messages on her phone again, uncertain about what to make of them, yet inexplicably jealous of this other Fate who did what she was too terrified to do for the past 2 years. Reach out and talk to Nanoha.

It was times like these she wished for the nightly phone calls from the white mage again.

When she would lie in bed, staring at her number lit up on the screen of her phone until she hung up. Hearing her voice, seeing her, would definitely break her resolve to stay away. To give Nanoha the life she deserved by being out of it. So she would just let it ring through to voice mail, imagining all the things she wanted to much to say. But those calls had long stopped coming. And she would never be brave enough to be the one to call her.

"Bardiche."

_"Yes, Sir."_ the magical device answered, wordlessly activating her barrier jacket as she slipped out the window and into the night sky.

The flight always helped to clear her head a little.

She cruised silently through the night, drawing long pensive arcs of gold in the sky, pulling further and further away from the city until it was a mere glow on the horizon. She had flown without thinking. Without planning. But yet she found herself in an all too familiar place.

Fate sighed, slowing her approach to a dead halt. The twin moons of Mid Childa hung low in the sky, painting the landscape in an ephemeral blue. She had not been here in years now. It had always been too painful.

It still was.

The enforcer lingered a moment longer staring out into the distance before turning to leave.

A small glow caught her eye.

It seemed to be coming from far below on one of the cliff faces.

_An enemy? So close to Cranagan?_ The blonde narrowed her eyes, readying her weapon before swooping down towards the source of the light. Though what she found was not exactly an enemy.

"Nanoha?"

The flight instructor turned to face the blonde with a small smile. She sat at the top of a particularly nondescript cliff, Raising Heart lying on the ground next to her, emitting a faint pink glow. The brunette slowly got to her feet, lifting off the ground to meet Fate mid-air.

"I hoped I would find you here." she said softly.

Fate blinked, still uncertain if this was all actually happening. She had not seen the brunette in years. But none of those months apart had done anything to dull the feelings she still barely held back. "But… Why…"

Nanoha took a deep breath. She had rehearsed this so many times in her mind but now that she actually stood in front of Fate, she felt her nerves begin to take over. "I have so many regrets, Fate." she began shakily. "So many things I wanted to apologise for but never got the chance to."

"Since the day you left, I've wanted to tell you that without you, my life just isn't complete. I kept telling myself I was choosing between you and my family, without realising that you were my family.

"I'm sorry I was not strong enough to stop you. I'm sorry I've been so selfish. I'm sorry I didn't tell you I love you."

Nanoha felt the tears slip down her face.

"And when you forgot me, I felt like I had lost you forever. And now, I think it is already long past the time for apologies and forgiveness. And I've already lost you."

There was nothing but silence for the longest moment. With every passing moment, the flight instructor felt her heart break that little bit more. Perhaps she really was too late now…

In one smooth motion, Fate stepped forward, pulling her into a tight embrace. Nanoha stiffened slightly in surprise as she felt those familiar arms wrap themselves around her, filling her mind with the scent of lilies she had missed so much. Her tears fell soundlessly onto the enforcer's white coat, making small damp spots. She almost lost herself in the warmth she had craved to feel again, the blonde's steady heartbeat, that soothing voice in her ear.

"Nanoha… I can live this life a thousand times over and you'll always be the one. You have always been the one. I couldn't forget you even if I tried."

Hearing those words broke her down completely. Her hands gripped at the back of Fate's barrier jacket tightly, her exhausted sobs muffled by the blonde's strong shoulders. All this time, pretending to be strong. Pretending to be okay.

Fate felt Nanoha push slightly at her shoulders, putting a small distance between the both of them to look the blonde steadily in the eyes.

"I may not deserve your love." Nanoha started. "Or you. But I will spend every day telling you I love you. Spend the rest of my life doing everything in my power to make you happy."

The brunette pulled the necklace out from under the black shirt of her barrier jacket, giving it a single rough tug to free the single white gold band that hung on it.

"Fate Testarossa Harlaown." Nanoha said in an even voice, holding the slightly worn ring out. "Will you marry me again?"

* * *

_1 year later..._

The young officer took a deep breath, shifting uncomfortably in the stifling uniform. The sun was bearing down on the parade square, promising to bake all of them to a crisp before the ceremony was over.

She snapped to attention as her row sharply turned to their right, filing towards the small stage. One by one, their names were called. They took the center of the stage. The general issued them their new rank. Then they marched back down to join the ranks of freshly graduated officers.

"Lieutenant Vivio Takamachi-Harlaown."

Vivio clicked her heels smartly together and marched towards the brunette in the middle of the stage, coming to a stop and saluting sharply. Hayate gave her a warm smile, stepping forward to pin the new rank insignia on the young blonde's shoulders.

"Your mothers will be proud of you, Lieutenant." the general said softly, returning the salute.

Vivio felt the faint blush dust her cheeks, daring herself a glance towards the rather massive crowd of spectators. Her heterochromic eyes picked up her two particularly outstanding mothers in the first few rows. Mostly because Nanoha was standing on her chair waving a "Vivio, we love you!" banner while making loud whistling noises, and her very embarrassed wife, attempting to drag her back down to her seat.

"Nanoha!" Fate whispered as loudly as she could. "Please sit down! It's dangerous to stand on your chair!"

The white mage turned to her wife with teary eyes. "But it's our daughter's big commissioning ceremony!"

Hayate face faulted on stage, deciding it was probably better to ignore them for now. She turned to the young officer in front of her to see the slight hint of tears in those mismatched eyes.

"Is everything alright, Vivio-chan?"

Vivio looked up at the general, a bright smile stretching across her face.

"Yes, General." she beamed. "Everything is alright now."

_fin._


	12. The Hayate Route

A/N: So this was not the ending I had originally planned for. It sort of just... Happened. But hey, isn't that the running theme in this story? I hope you have enjoyed reading Remember Me as much as I have enjoyed writing it. Please leave a review!

Happy valentines' day everyone!

* * *

**The Hayate Route**

Hayate stood motionless in the shower, cool water pouring down on her, running in cold rivers down her back, through her hair which matted itself down on her head, masking the tears. The white t shirt she wore was soaked through, sticking to her body, making it feel even colder than it really was.

But at this point, she would do anything to feel anything but this pain.

She choked back another sob. It was thoroughly unbecoming of a general to cry. Especially over something as trivial as matters of the heart.

She felt a pair of warm arms embrace her from behind, startling her slightly before she heard the familiar low voice.

"You can cry if you need to."

The brunette was silent for a moment. Then her walls fell, her voice leaving her in anguished cries as she clutched at her aching chest.

"I never did anything she wasn't sure she wanted." Hayate cried, tears falling free. "I knew this would all have to end. So why does this hurt so much?"

"It's okay, Hayate…" Signum said soothingly, holding the brunette tightly, feeling the small body in her arms shake. The cold water rained down on her back, saturating her uniform and hair. It killed her inside to watch her mistress be in so much agony. But it was far more torturous knowing there was nothing she could do.

"Am I bad person for wanting her to love me instead…"

Signum never said anything. But Hayate didn't need her to.

* * *

_2 weeks later..._

"General Yagami, preparations are complete. The Wolfram is ready for departure."

"Thank you Sergeant." Hayate nodded to the soldier in front of her. The young woman saluted sharply and left the cabin and Hayate to her thoughts. There really was no need for a general to take on this simple 5 month long mission. She had always berated Fate for running away from her problems. But right now, she could really see the draw.

There was a quiet knock on the door.

"Fuck off…" sighed Hayate, letting her hand flop over her eyes as she leaned back into her chair. She really was not in the mood for further interruptions of her moping.

She heard the door click open. A scowl formed on her face as she sat up, ready to give whoever dared come in a good tongue lashing, and possibly an overly harsh trip to the brig. She got out of her seat, rearranging her expression to what she hoped was an angry one.

"I thought I told you to go-"

The general stopped mid sentence at the sight in front of her. This was not happening. This could not possibly be happening. Fate could not possibly be standing in her office with that warm look in her eyes.

If this was her imagination, her mind was a cruel thing.

"Fate… Why-" Hayate began uncertainly.

"You're a difficult person to track down when you don't want to be found."

"That's the entire point of going into hiding." muttered the general.

Fate frowned, stepping towards the general. "I thought you said you weren't going anywhere."

"But my job is done. You have Nanoha." Saying those words stung more than she expected it to. She turned away from Fate, frantically blinking back the tears that began to prick the corners of her eyes.

"This is my decision, Hayate."

The general fell silent, fighting back that tiny glimmer of hope that threatened to spark in her heart. Hope and wishful thinking was what got her into this state to begin with.

"Hayate…" the blonde began again, turning the brunette around to look her in the eye. "I meant what I said. I'm serious about this. About us."

"Fate…"

"I want to give this a chance. I want to give us a chance. You've always been there for me. Now, more than anything I want to be able to be there for you too. Give you everything I have to give."

Hayate gazed quietly into those burgundy eyes, but all she found was sincerity and warmth.

"Are you sure this is what you want, Fate?" she asked softly.

Fate returned the intense gaze. "Yes."

"Then..." Hayate began, feeling the pain in her chest begin to fade. "I'm yours."

The blonde smiled, pulling the general into a tight embrace, feeling the familiar sensation of the smaller girl's body pressed against her own, the scent of violets filling her senses. Hesitantly, the brunette returned the hug, her arms snaking around the enforcer's waist, finally allowing herself to fully relax.

"You know my Wolkenritter will kill you right?" Hayate asked half jokingly into the taller girl's shoulder.

Fate chuckled. "Bring it on."

* * *

_1 year later..._

"Hayate, are you already going home?"

The general looked up from the briefcase she was packing to give Vita a bright smile.

"Yeah. We've got reservations at that new place in the city."

The redheaded knight sighed dramatically, rolling her eyes as she leaned against the door frame. "Trying to buy your affection with swanky Italian food?"

Hayate smiled, ruffling the small knight's hair out of habit, earning herself a mock scowl.

"You know she doesn't have to do that." the brunette said.

Vita would never admit it, but she was glad. It had been so long since she saw Hayate truly happy. And as much as she disliked _that woman_, if Hayate was happy, she was too.

The brunette picked up the small leather briefcase, making her way out of the office towards the front of the building.

The soldier at the lobby saluted smartly as Hayate stepped out from the revolving glass door. "General. Would you like me to get your car?

"Not today, Sergeant." Hayate waved as a sleek black car pulled into the lobby. The passenger door slid open smoothly and the brunette lightly slid into the leather seat, shutting the door behind her. The car gently roared into motion, speeding steadily out of the TSAB complex and onto the darkened streets.

"How was your day?" Hayate asked, giving her girlfriend a soft kiss on the cheek.

"Much better now." Fate gave her a warm smile and the brunette felt her heart flutter in her chest.

There was that smile she loved. The one she fought to protect. The one she wanted so much to see again.

Wishes did come true after all.

_fin._


End file.
